He takes another step forward, putting his beautiful face near mine as he kisses my wet cheek. “I’m not. I’m telling you…it’s fake. I am insecureallthe time. Why do you think I can only fuck strangers? Because I’m afraid if anyone sees the real me, they’ll be disappointed. So I put on all this,” he says, gesturing from his hair to his shoes, “to trick people into thinking I’m better than everyone else.”
My lips part as I stare into his bright blue eyes. Then I lift a hand, running my fingers through his perfect hair to mess it up. “I see the real you, Julian Kade. And I’m not disappointed. Not at all.”
Leaning forward, he whispers, “Andyouare the kind of person who owns a restaurant.”
Wrapping my arms around his neck, I squeeze him tight. There is so much more comfort in Julian’s embrace than I expected. His hugs are warm. They make me feel like I’m not so alone. It’s like he sees right into my soul.
As we pull apart, I sniffle, wiping away the residual tears on my face. “Thank you. I don’t know what came over me.”
Archer steps into the storage room, placing a large hand on my shoulder. “This is a big deal, Chef. It’s natural to be overwhelmed. Take your time.”
“Thanks,” I reply with a smile. “And I’m sorry for not kissing you outside,” I add to Julian. “It was just so?—”
“I was jealous,” he adds, surprising me with the sudden vulnerability. “But I understand how new this is. It’s new for all of us.”
“You were jealous?” I ask, fighting a grin as it tugs on my cheeks.
“Of course I was,” he replies with a divot between his brows. “I don’t like feeling like the third wheel.”
In moments like this, it all feels so surreal. A relationship with three people isn’t what society is accustomed to, but that doesn’t make it wrong. My heart knows that it’s all of us or nothing, but my head keeps reminding me of how hard this could be for us. Telling our families. Our friends. Society.
Archer being Archer, he smothers Julian’s discomfort, sandwiching him between us as he kisses his cheek. “You’re not the third wheel.”
Julian fakes a smile, but beneath it, I worry that there’s still so much apprehension. I worry that he thinks he could be removed from this relationship and Archer and I could be together without him.
Could we?
My heart hates that idea.
My mind wonders if it wouldn’t make everything a little easier.
Rule #19: Show her what she means to you.
Julian
“This property is eighty square meters, with a fully refurbished kitchen and a rooftop patio. We can head up to see that.”
As Delia drones on about the properties, the third one we’ve seen today, I am spinning in my mind. When the three of us woke up this morning, everything felt perfect. The scales were balanced.
But then Freya showed up and gave Archer that kiss, and it’s been spiraling in my head ever since. Am I the outsider? The third? The extra?
Could they be happy without me?
As I watch Freya, who’s gotten more comfortable as the day has progressed, ask questions of Delia with Archer by her side, I have this gnawing, buzzing itch to do something growing under my skin.
“You okay?” Archer asks, clearly noticing my dour mood.
I shrug in response, my eyes not leaving Freya as she scopes out the place.
“You know she didn’t mean anything by it,” he says.
“No, Idon’tknow that.”
As I stare through the dusty window of the empty restaurant, Archer appears behind me. His hand strokes my back, and it’s comforting but doesn’t quite settle this feeling inside me.
“You’re not the third wheel,” he whispers, his lips soft against my ear.
“Not to you I’m not,” I reply, turning to stare at him.
