“I don’t! How do you not see that?” I hadtriedtelling them. I hadwantedthere to be an option other than lying. But they had me totally backed into a corner. “What else was I supposed to do? Every time I tried to bring it up, all either of you would do was roll your eyes or pretend to puke. Fine, he did something shitty a whole year ago, but what about how I felt about it? All you would ever do was demand that I get over it, right now, this minute. And I get it, I’m a buzzkill whose inconvenient feelings are ruining the vibe, but I’m the one who has to deal with them after both of you are gone, and neither of you were willing to listen. So okay, when the only person I have to talk to about how I felt showed back up, I wanted to give it another try. If it was a different guy, you wouldn’t care at all!” But no one is responding to me anymore. “Anya? Mari?” I’mstanding in front of them, practically begging for forgiveness, but they are looking resolutely away, jaws set.
And then, because things of course can’t be bad enough, Wes jogs up to join the fun with the box of condoms in a small paper bag. “Hold up. Why is everyone yelling?” His grin fades once he gets close enough to read the room.
“Oh, hey, Wes.” Anya eyes the bag, whose contents everyone now knows. “Fancy seeing you here.”
“Um. I feel like I’ve missed something.” He looks around.
“We were just a little surprised to see Sora with you is all,” Mari says, voice dripping with hurt.
Wes takes a step toward them like he’s confident in his ability to defuse the situation. “Okay, I know you guys have never been my biggest fans, but since Sora and I have been lowkey together for the past few months I kind of figured you’d gotten over it?”
Oh, God. I bury my head in my hands and groan.
“What?”Anya’s eyes are bulging and her red face is becoming a bruised purplish blue. “?‘Lowkey together’? What does that even mean? This has been going on formonths?”
“I’m going to stop talking now.” Wes takes a step back once he realizes the hole he’s dug us.
“Is this true, Sora?” Mari asks. She’s never looked more intimidating.
Wes stands there, hands shoved in his pockets, probably assessing how big of a dick move it would be to turnaround and leave me to the vultures. He averts his eyes to avoid making eye contact.
I fess up. “Yeah. Wes and I have been hanging out. It’s not like I wanted to keep it from you, but it’s also not like I could ever get a word in.”
“I can’t even with you right now, Sora. I’ve lost count, but this amounts to hundreds and hundreds of lies,” Anya snaps.
“I’m sorry! I just couldn’t think of how to tell you where it wouldn’t make you both upset.” I pause. I want to add that clearly this situation is a perfect example of me being right, but all signs suggest saying that aloud would not help. “You are my two best friends. Don’t leave things like this.”
To my surprise, it’s not Anya who gets in the last word, but Mari. “Yeah, well. You say that. But best friends don’t lie.”
I stand there, stunned. “Don’t you dare quoteStranger Thingsto me right now,” I say. I mean to show my hurt, but it instead sounds like I’m yelling. It’s because of all the blows I’ve just been dealt that the one from Mari hits the hardest. We’ve been watching the show together every year since we were kids, piled with blankets in Mari’s living room.
But instead of responding, they leave. Anya’s arm is snug around Mari’s shoulder as they stomp back toward the hotel.
I don’t chase after them.
I feel sick. This is different from any of our other fights. There will be no making up in thirty minutes. There will be no laughing about it before bed like we did about the bus ride. Of all the situations I’ve ever found myself in, this is the one I’m least likely to talk myself out of.
Where can our vacation—and more importantly, our friendship—even go from here?
CHAPTER 21
All our plans go toshit, and Wes and I find ourselves down by the water. This time, when I’m splayed out like a starfish on the pebbled beach, it’s the opposite of a relaxing paradise. Everything is a mess. Anya and Mari, my two best friends in the entire world, absolutely hate me. I’m twisted with guilt and regret, my stomach tangled into a dozen knots. How did I get here? What could I have done to avoid this? I should have known it was a ticking time bomb, flying so close to the sun. Lies always catch up to you. Especially when you’re so reckless about them.
Do I need to start looking at flights home? Or a new place to stay? I can’t even imagine going back to the room tonight. I’ll have to crash with Wes. But what will I do every night after? We still have more than two weeks left in Sorrento.
“You okay, Sora?” Wes’s voice is soft and concerned. He stands over me, blocking out the moon. It makes it look like his hair is on fire.
“No” is all I manage.
“Come on, let’s sit up.” Wes tugs me upright and sitsdown next to me. He nudges my head to rest on his shoulder as we both stare out at the sea, the ripples of shimmering water. He adjusts his shirt so it’s under my wet, soaking cheek. “Here, cry on my shirt if you want.”
So, I do. We sit there in complete silence except for the sound of my sniffling and the gentle crash of waves. These are the moments Anya and Mari never see, when Wes is kind and supportive. They never even gave him a chance to redeem himself. Why does it have to be him or them? They hadn’t given me a literal ultimatum, but it’s sure felt like one ever since prom.
“Ugh!” I lift my head up and throw it into my hands. “This is sofrustrating. I can’t live the life they want me to live. What, is their friendship conditional? If I’m not dating who they want me to date, then we can’t be friends?”
“Honestly, Sora? Girl drama is something I don’t have a ton of experience with.”
“This isn’t drama, Wes. It’s a fight.” I wipe tears from my face.
