I sipped my tea slowly, enjoying the bright sun and thinking that this was exactly how the end of August was supposed to feel. Perfect weather for Lucas’ arrival.
I glanced back inside at the living room wall, where all his photos were hanging again. Every frame was back in its place. After printing the new ones his camp leader had sent, I’d made a collage for the wall in his room, carefully spacing them out, smoothing the corners, stepping back again and again to make sure it looked just right. I hadn’t realized how empty the apartment had felt without those reminders of him until I put them back up. Seeing his face everywhere steadied something in me, as I could finally breathe properly again.
I was too excited to eat breakfast. The nerves sat high in my chest, buzzing. I gulped down a glass of orange juice and forced myself to munch on a slice of toast, more out of obligation than hunger. While waiting for the clock to strike twelve, I kept myself busy preparing thecheesecake bites for the picnic the next day, lining them up neatly and double-checking the recipe even though I’d made it a dozen times before. I needed my hands occupied. Waiting never came easily to me, especially not today.
After a quick shower, I changed into a purple maxi dress and did one last sweep of my squeaky-clean apartment. Everything was in its place. That was how I coped when my emotions threatened to spill over. Grabbing my bag, I scurried out the door, my heart already racing ahead of me.
My phone rang just as I stepped into the hallway.
“Hi! I wanted to talk to you—” Caleb’s voice started, and then the line cut out as I entered the elevator.
I sighed and sent him a quick text.
ME:
I’ll call you back in a minute. In the elevator. No connection.
As the doors slid shut, I leaned back against the mirrored wall, watching my own reflection and wondering why my pulse had jumped at the sound of his voice when all I should have been thinking about was Lucas. Today was about my son. It always was, and it always would be.
The lift opened, and the moment I stepped out and turned the corner, I collided straight into someone solid. I jerked my head back in surprise. “What’s wrong? How come you’re here?”
Caleb stood in front, looking slightly breathless, like he’d hurried. “I… um, wanted to discuss something with you about, you know, the contract.”
Of all days. Are you kidding me?“I’m sorry,” I said, already shifting my weight toward the lobby doors, “but I’m late. I need to be somewhere…”
“Yes, I know,” he replied, irritation slipping into his voice. “You have to go meet Lucas.”
I glanced toward the exit, and then back at him.
“This is important, though,” he continued, leaning forward slightly,urgency written all over him. “Can we discuss it on the way? I can drop you.” He looked almost restless, subtly bouncing on his toes, as if he’d already decided the answer for both of us.
I hesitated for a fraction of a second. I didn’t want to be late. I didn’t want complications. But I also didn’t have time to argue. “Okay,” I said.
I followed him to the car, punching the school’s location into his GPS once we were inside. As he pulled out into traffic, I glanced at him a couple of times, waiting for him to start talking. He didn’t. Instead, he stared ahead, elbow resting on the ledge, fingers rubbing at his temple, his brow drawn tight. He looked troubled. And for reasons I didn’t fully understand, that concerned me.
“So,” I prompted finally, unable to stand the silence any longer, “you said you wanted to talk about the contract? Is there a problem?” I fidgeted with my handbag, adjusting the strap, then smoothing it again. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d sat in complete silence with him for this long. It felt heavy, charged in a way I didn’t have the bandwidth to unpack.
“I’m just trying to figure it out myself,” he said at last. “I think I can solve the problem on my own rather than involving you.”
And then—nothing.
Silence camped between us again.What is going on with him?
As we turned right onto Pierre Gardens Avenue, the school came into view. My breath caught. Wait—is that the bus? My heart lurched.
I checked my watch. 12:15 p.m.Oh no.
They must have been running ahead of schedule. Had Lucas been waiting? Had he been looking around, wondering why I wasn’t there yet? Guilt surged through me.
As we drew closer, I saw him stepping off the bus.
Blue shorts. Black T-shirt.I still live with my mom.
My chest practically exploded. “Oh my gosh! I see him!” I screamed. I didn’t even wait for the car to stop completely. I shoved the door open and jumped out, vaguely registering Caleb’s gasp and his voice yelling something behind me.
Lucas ran, screaming, “Mama!”
I dropped to my knees just in time to catchhim as he launched himself into my arms. The impact knocked the breath out of me, but I didn’t care. I kissed his face over and over, squeezing him tight, holding him like I’d never let go again. My heart felt too big for my chest, like it might burst open from sheer relief and joy.
