“People keep trying to set me up on dates, despite my telling them I’m not interested. And I’m sick of it.”
I swallowed hard.What?I lifted my baseball cap, smoothing back my hair before shoving the hat on my head—again.Fuck.
“For the wedding, or in general?” I asked, trying to keep my voice calm. Even.
I hadn’t realized that Bryn was ready to date or even interested in the idea. She’d stopped wearing her wedding ring months ago, but… I shook my head. No. Surely she wasn’t…
Not that I was judging her. I just didn’t know what to make of it.
“For the wedding. My future. They love to tell me what Derek would want.” She scoffed. “Derek would want you to be happy. Derek wouldn’t want you to be alone.” She affected a different tone, as if to mimic another woman’s voice. “Even Derek’smomtold me that.”
I didn’t disagree with the sentiment, but I also knew that Bryn had to do what felt best for her. Sure, maybe she needed a push. But we also had to know when to give her space. It was one of the hardest things I’d ever had to grapple with.
“And it’s not just them. One of my coworkers has been trying to set me up with someone.” She shook her head. “They say it’s about what Derek would want, but it’s about them.Theydon’t want me to be alone.”
I gnashed my teeth, annoyed they were overstepping.
Be honest,a little voice said.That’s not the only reason you’re annoyed.But I shoved it away. She’d been married to my best friend. And despite how I felt…it didn’t matter. I needed to focus on Bryn—what she wanted, what she needed.
“What do you want?” I asked.
“A time machine,” she answered bluntly, though it didn’t escape my notice that she’d avoided my question.
“Bryn,” I sighed. “If I could buy you one, I would.”
“Thanks, Bear. I just…” She sighed. “I don’t want to be the center of so much attention for something so awful anymore. Especially not on a day that should be a celebration. I’m tired of the pitying looks, the curious whispers. I’m tired of being treated like I’m made of glass.”
Losing your spouse had to be painful enough, but to have her greatest tragedy become national news? To have to grieve his loss so publicly? And yet to show so much strength and grace was a testament to her character.
I honestly didn’t know how she did it. As Derek’s best friend and teammate, I’d certainly been asked my fair share of invasive questions about the man, his loss, his legacy. But she’d been hiswife.
Many times, I’d wanted to punch someone in the face solely for asking a question about Derek. Yet anytime Bryn spoke about Derek, she was full of poise, representing Derek’s legacy with grace.
Bryn leaned back on her hands and stared up at the ceiling. And as always, she took my breath away. She had been to hell and back, and she was one of the strongest people I knew. And that was saying something, considering my teammates were some of the most elite athletes in the league, in the nation.
When her attention turned to me, I glanced down, hoping she hadn’t noticed me staring. How could I not? She was gorgeous—blond hair, blue eyes, dark lashes, pouty lips.
But it wasn’t just about her looks. She was also wicked smart. She assisted doctors who performed literal brain surgery. Onchildren. That took guts. And mental strength.
She cared about her patients, going above and beyond. Most of them sent her holiday cards long after they’d been discharged because she’d made such a positive impact on their lives. Hell, I’d seen her comfort Derek’s fans when they should’ve beenconsoling her. She cared about everyone. Sometimes I wondered if she cared too much.
“You could skip it.” I was joking, mostly. If skipping her sister’s wedding would protect Bryn’s mental peace, then I was all for it.
Bryn gave me a flat look. “She’s my sister. And I’m a bridesmaid. Though, thank god, I’m not the maid—” She furrowed her brow. “Matron? Of honor. At least I don’t have to plan the bachelorette party, the bridal shower. All I have to do is show up, and even that sounds like too much effort.”
I shrugged, trying to act calm when all I wanted was to wrap her up in my arms and protect her. “Feign illness at the last minute.”
“That would definitely ruin Allie’s day. And I want to be there for her. Of course I do. But, ugh…” She flopped back on the bed, and I didn’t look away fast enough. Now I couldn’t tear my eyes away.
Even in her cornflower-blue scrubs, I could see the outline of her curves. Her breasts and hips were fuller now that she’d gained back some of the weight she’d lost after Derek’s death. That was a relief. But she was still thinner than she’d been. I was just grateful she was eating, even if she lacked the passion she used to have for food.
Bryn was still talking, and I caught back on at the tail end, just as she said, “And then I justhadto tell her I had a date to the wedding.”
The idea of Bryn with another man had my gut tightening, the air being squeezed from my lungs.
“Who?” My voice came out as a growl.
“That’s just it.” Bryn rolled to her side, propping her head up on her hand. She blew out a breath, pink tingeing her cheekbones. “I lied.”
