My body. My mind. My heart.My soul.All of it empty and unfeeling from the moment I awoke.
Since we arrived in Prallues, Shade had never missed a sunrise. This morning, when I forced my puffy eyes open, they locked on his usual spot in front of the window to find it empty. When I palmed the lamp with a bloody hand, smoke swirled around the room once before retreating inside. I watched light crest over the horizon alone, hot thick tears tracking down my cheeks the entire time. Then I placed the lamp under the sunlight, hoping Shade would still feel its warmth.
When Wista arrived to help me get ready, she didn’t mention my missing shadow or the fact I looked like I spent the entire night crying.
Which I had.
She went about getting me ready, helping me bathe and dress when it became clear I couldn’t do it myself. Only when Terymhad beaten me did I let her help. I felt so much worse than I had then. Even self-inflicted, this wound cut so much deeper.
We didn’t speak when she pulled out the outrageous gown, or when she worked my hair into a delicate twist and lined my cheeks with rouge. When she was done, I stared at my reflection in the mirror. The pink on my cheeks was stark against my pale skin, and it did nothing to detract from my sunken lifeless eyes.
I only saw pain.
Wista guided me through the castle, and it didn’t take long before I stood at the doors of a large stone chapel, the sun mocking me from its place high in the sky.
Beautiful weather.
A perfect day for a wedding.
Wista stuck to my side while Zuri and a few other maids straightened the large train. Yet I felt nothing. Not even amusement at the ridiculous gown chosen for me.
A haze settled over my eyes as I stared unseeing.
Pressure against my hand drew my attention, so I blinked my mind into focus, finding Eleanor’s hazel eyes shining back at me. “Lia? Are you sure? We can leave, fuck the king.”
Her words were jarring, so out of place coming from my sister’s mouth. The king’s people surrounded us, servants and castle guards lined every path in view. Despite her words, there was no way out. Terym’s threat rang loud and clear in my mind. He would stop at nothing to get us back if we disappeared, and the wrath he would inflict when he found us …
I couldn’t risk it, not an impulsive plan to escape. This was the only way forward. I would sacrifice this part of myself to keep my sister safe.
The large chapel doors swung open, and I shook my head, the organ’s dooming notes calling us in. I floated down the aisle in a trance, my sister at my side. My body went through the motions, with my heart bleeding in my chest. Unfamiliar faces swarmedand blurred together until I reached the dais and the man who waited there.
The man whowasn’tShade.
Shade, who I had hurt so deeply he had retreated to a place he despised—locked himself away to escape me and the pain I inflicted.
A priest spoke. I only listened enough to repeat the words required of me. My voice dull and lifeless, even to my own ears.
I zoned out until Terym leaned closer, the priest’s last words registering too late. “You may kiss the bride, Your Majesty.”
Then his lips were on mine.
Rough. Firm. Wrong.
So, so wrong.
The fog cleared, and I jerked away from the king’s touch, consequences be damned. Hands wrapped around my arms, and I struggled against the bruising grip.
I had to get away. I didn’t want him to touch me. It wasn’t right.Hewasn’t right.
Gasps and murmurs erupted from the watching guests, and a deep scowl lined Terym’s face. It should have terrified me, but all I could think about was his hands on me and how wrong it was.
“My apologies, my king. My sister is quite overwhelmed.” Eleanor’s voice cut through the chaos, clearing my mind enough to register the cool expression plastered across Terym’s face.
“See to it she is back to herself before the reception.”
The echoing murmurs quietened, with guests ushered back to the ballroom within the castle to be entertained with food and drink.
Terym leaned close, his hot breath sour as he whispered in my ear. “Remember my promise, my dear Adelia.” He followed the crowd, leaving us with only the guards lining the walls.
