I bit my lip, trying to hold in the screams wanting to be unleashed. It stung, and another liquid joined the tears running down my face, the split in my skin opening at the rough treatment.
Sobs lurched from my chest, and I clutched the lamp tighter. Closer. Willing its hum to soothe and wash away the pain. To free me from the turmoil.
The scent of purloe flowers invaded my senses—woodsy and floral andcomfort.Fingers dusted along my cheeks, collecting my tears, and I opened my eyes to find silver orbs locked on mine. Shade’s face was a mixture of concern and something much darker, a simmering sort of rage that spoke of danger and retribution.
His gaze traced every visible injury, and I glanced at the lamp in my hands, unsure how I released him, to find my blood-soaked tears had dripped onto the black surface.
I tried to sit up, but the movement sparked pain in the rib that must be sprained, if not broken. I paused, sucking in a sharp breath, then strong hands cradled my shoulders, and Shade eased me back against the pillows. The blankets had fallen slightly, exposing the top of my sheer night dress and the extensive bruises already darkening my torso.
“You’re hurt.” Shade’s voice was deeper than I had ever heard it, stormy silver eyes locked on where the bruising was darkest. He inhaled deeply, nostrils flaring, then his gaze met mine. “Who did this?”
Chapter 19
The rumbly growl accompanying his words sent the hairs on my arms standing on end. Shame filled me like acid, and I scrambled to pull the covers over me once more, hiding the evidence of my punishment.
I avoided his gaze, staring at my hands twisting in my lap. This was exactly why I hadn’t wanted to release him. “I-it’s fine. I’m fine.”
Gentle fingers hooked under my chin, lifting my face to his. Liquid silver held me hostage, and I couldn’t turn away. The way he looked at me … like he saw everything, like I was his entire world. “You are notfine. Who. Did. This?”
There was a desperation in his command, and I found I couldn’t deny him. Not when the intensity of his eyes conveyed so much I struggled to discern it all. “Terym,” I whispered. “It was King Terym.”
A ball of something I didn’t recognize sparked in my chest. Shade’s expression darkened even further, the grip on my chintightening. Not to the point of pain; if anything, the possessive hold elicited a different feeling—a longing deep within me I hadn’t felt with anyone but him—smothering the strange energy I didn’t quite understand building in my chest.
Fire danced in those bright eyes as he leaned forward, fingers still holding me immobile. Then his lips brushed my forehead, the light contact setting my skin ablaze and forcing my lips to part in surprise. Everything consuming me moments before evaporated, his touch dissolving every worry. Every fear. Every hurt. Leaving me in a state of still serenity.
When he drew back, his eyes blazed, but his face was unreadable. “I can kill him.”
He said the words so casually, as if they were fact, and it took me a second to realize what he meant.
“What?” I needed him to repeat them, sure I somehow misunderstood.
“The lamp binds me. In some ways, I’m restricted, but if you wish me to, I can kill him.” So calm and collected while speaking of death.
Bloody hands danced in my mind, the echoing sounds of death fresh after my recent flashbacks. “I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“Because …” Because it would stain your soul. Doom you to a pained life filled with acidic guilt, slowly eating away at your humanity.
The worst part was, a small kernel of hate in my chest wanted it. For threatening Eleanor. For what he had done to me, what he would force me to do. It wanted his death. Wanted him tohurt.
The rest of me, the logical side, remembered vacant hazel eyes and pooling blood. The burden of a death on your soul. The way Shade spoke so casually made me think it wouldn’t be the first time he had taken a life, but I wouldn’t put that on him. Not when my own failings had put me in this situation.
“I can’t. Not again.”
The sins of my past filled my chest, adding weight to the king’s demands. Tears pricked my eyes again, and I curled in on myself. Strong arms wrapped around me, then Shade cradled me to his chest, taking my place on the bed and sitting with me in his lap. He was careful in moving me, barely jostling my injuries.
Other than his light touches on my arms and massaging my legs, it was the first time I had touched him properly. The solidness of his body was surprising. I expected softness and wispy smoke, but he was all hard muscles and thrumming warmth, even with the dark tendrils curling along his skin.
“I’ll do whatever you wish of me, no matter the cost,” he murmured into my hair, and I nuzzled closer, inhaling lilac and sandalwood and the uniqueness of the purloe flower. He hadn’t asked me what I meant, only vowing his loyalty to me entirely.
The strange hum of his heartbeat vibrated beneath my cheek, and I sunk into it, relishing the contentment settling over me.
Safety.That’s what this feeling was.
It was warm nights in front of the fire as snow swirled outside. It was the scent of my mother’s favorite cookies. The sound of a lock sliding into place.
In this moment, nothing and no one could touch me.
