He wrinkles his face. ‘No, I’ll do them.’
I can only think he must have decided to put his personal distaste to one side because the Kittiwake cause is so important.
He rests the box on the back of a harbourside bench, and clicks the key to lock the car. ‘It’s not only for the fun – it’s also for the help up at Walter’s. If you’re up for that, I’ll be there to pour egg over you as often as you need me to.’
I’m hoping Walter’s won’t always be as time-consuming as it was today, or I’ll never fit any baking in. As for the egg moment, as it flashes through my mind again my insides are withering with embarrassment, but if he knows that he’ll only push it more.
I make my voice airy. ‘Whenever you want to show me what to do at Walter’s, let me know.’ I’m sending frantic fairy-g messages into the ether, asking please can it not involve too many animals. ‘And for the evenings, I’ve decided the key to success is to keep things simple.’ I’m learning from experience. The fewer complications I have to worry about, the more smoothly they go.
He shrugs. ‘People love it whatever you do, you’re so bubbly and entertaining to watch. And your baking is delicious.’
I let out a groan. ‘I was definitelynotbubbly when my head was over the bath and I watched my face disappearing down the plughole.’
He gives a choke that’s very close to a laugh. ‘You have to admit, the natural disaster made for such a memorable evening, we could always do a replay?’
I’m suddenly getting where he’s going with this. ‘We areso notdoing that every time!’
He doesn’t seem to be hearing me. ‘Oryoucould pour the egg onme? I don’t mind taking one for the team!’
As I stare out at the lights twinkling around the bay, and the muted lines of surf frothing up the beach in the darkness, it hits me – he isn’t even meant to be on the team. But there’s something else too. I know he’s a lot more morose now, and nothing like he used to be when he was young and boisterous and came around to our place with Charlie. But there’s still this undeniable feeling that a room comes alive when he walks into it. And this isn’t just me, I can tell it’s something everyone picks up on; things are much better when he’s there than when he isn’t. Obviously on a personal level, it’s completely the opposite of that; when he turns up, more often than not my day goes downhill very fast. But for the next few weeks, I’m resigned to working with that. If having him around means more cash for Kittiwake Court, that has to take priority and I need to put my own preferences to one side.
I’m overcome by a sudden rush of gratitude for the way he’s throwing himself into this. ‘Thank you, Bradbury, I really appreciate what you’re doing here.’
His brow wrinkles in a puzzled frown. ‘What are you thanking me for?’
‘For being a fabulous assistant. And all the rest, obviously.’
‘You’re welcome.’ He pauses. ‘It’s actually been forever since anyone called me Bradbury.’
Damn. I’m kicking myself for the slip. ‘It probably won’t happen again.’ Not if I have anything to do with it.
He sighs. ‘And I owe you an apology – I was wrong to question your direction that day you missed Charlie’s message, I see that now.’
‘Another thank you for saying that too, Bradbury.’ That really will be the last time. But it must have taken guts for him to make that climb-down.
He stares out at a boat heading for the horizon, then his gaze flashes back to me. ‘Not many people light up a room the way you can. You’re so good at what you do, but it’s your warmth that people respond to. You being your very special self is what’s made you a star.’ He gives me a nudge. ‘If I was Walter, I’d take my hat off to you.’
Walter only takes his cap off to get his leg over, but I’m not going to remind him of that. As for the rest, I have to come clean. ‘I was doing well, but the ladder I was climbing was very fragile and now it’s all come crashing down. That’s the trouble with castles made of sugar.’
He’s still heaping on the praise. ‘You’ve got right to the top of your game, and you deserve total respect for that success.’
I pull in a breath, because I need to stop talking in metaphors and say it how it is. ‘I was successful once, but it really is all over now. People took against me after the TV show, and it’s all gone tits up as fast as it came. The publishers withdrew their offer, my sponsors are pulling out too. For now I’m getting by with these evenings and selling boxes of cakes at the doorstep.’ It’s a relief now it’s out. I feel lighter for telling him the truth. Less of a pretender. Speaking the words makes it more real, but it’s more than that. As if saying it out loud here I’m facing it properly myself for the first time too.
‘Shit, Cressy, I could have helped. Why didn’t you say?’
It’s a good question, and the answer is that I’m too proud. ‘I didn’t want anyone who mattered to know until I’d turned things around.’ Especially people like him and Charlie. ‘And youarehelping, but Iwillmanage. And it’ll be easier once I’m back in London.’
‘London?’ He’s more bemused than I thought. ‘But surely that’s not for ages?’
‘I live there, remember? I will be going back.’ I’m saying this for myself as much as for him. It may feel far away now but I’ll be back there in no time. And whatever I have to do to pull myself back up from the bottom, I’ll do it. I’m confident, so long as I work my socks off, the future will be rosy and I want to convey that. ‘Who knows? I may find I have an aptitude for farming!’
Ross has stopped a few yards short of the house. ‘So you’re not on Tinder after all?’
‘Of course I’m not on bloody Tinder.’ As if that mattered. ‘I run up and down stairs selling bits of cake.’
‘Thank Saturday for that.’ He blows out a breath. ‘And I knew cake boxes would work! Have you got any up at the flat? I can buy them off you straightaway. How about I take six?’
I roll my eyes because we’re back to his stomach again. ‘If I didn’t have cake at lunchtime, how will I have any now? In case you forgot, I spent the afternoon chasing sheep.’ Just saying. Then I remember – there could be a lot more of that to come, so I need to sound more upbeat about it. ‘I could do my induction up at Walter’s tomorrow?’
