“Christ,” Oakley mutters, grabbing an apple from the fridge before glancing at me, something almost hesitant in his gaze. “How, uh, do you see this going?”
“The rope? I figured I’d show up, you’d tie me up, and then you’d fuck me or do whatever else you think would feel good until you’re too tired to keep going any longer.”
Oakley misses a step on his way to Clover’s stall, his answering groan sounding pained. “Fucking hell. That’s not what I meant, butdamn.”
My eyes flick downward as Oakley discreetly adjusts himself. “Are you…hard right now?”
He shoots me a sharp look. “D’you have to bring it up?”
“I just… That’s all it takes?”
He groans again, passing the apple to Clover, who happily chomps the fruit. “Don’t let it go to your head, Law.”
“I think I’m gonna. You like the idea of fucking me that much? Is it because I’m giving you blanket permission to do whatever you want? Or is it the bondage that gets you going?”
Oakley bends over, his hands on his knees as he lets out a heavy breath. “Lawson, I swear to all that is holy and not, you needa stop talking, or I won’t be able to go inside that house full of people for lunch. Can we just…revisit this at a later time?”
“All right.”
He eyes me dubiously. “Yougonna be good?”
“For now,” I concede.
“Lord,” he murmurs, straightening.
I keep my mouth shut as we make our way to the ranch house, but I can’t help but sneak surreptitious glances Oakley’s way. Knowing I can push the man’s buttons so easily is…satisfying, if I’m being honest.
When we get to the back deck, Oakley veers off toward the adjoining outdoor washroom. I head inside, passing through the dining room full of people and into the hallway bathroom to wash up. I’m on my way to drop the beekeeper suit off in the mudroom when I nearly run into Jackson. My brother is muttering to himself, his gaze on the ground as he passes.
“Oh, Jesus. I didnotneed to see that. Nope. No. Nuh-uh.”
Curious, I peek my head into the living room, where I find Hank Darling dipping his ex-wife Marigold in a kiss. A smile plays at the corner of my lips, the sight one I’d happen upon from time to time in my childhood, whether my parents were married or not. I’ve seen it less these past twenty-some years, having lived away from the ranch house for so long.
“What was that for?” my mom asks the moment she’s upright, a few inches taller than my dad when standing.
He hums. “Someone reminded me today of the importance of holding close the good we’ve found in our lives.”
My mom sets her hands on her hips, her voice turning deceptively soft. “Good?”
“Oh Lord, Mari. You know that’s not what I—”
“I wouldthinkhaving spent over forty-five years with the person who birthed four of your sons—four—would rank higher thangood, but what do I know? Apparently, I’m at the same level as a decent slice of mild cheddar cheese.”
My dad sputters.
My mom, apparently having noticed me in the doorway, sends a quick wink my way before refocusing on her ex-husband, her expression screamingnow what do you have to say for yourself?
Shaking my head, I leave them to their bickering, realizing… Christ, it’s foreplay? Not wanting to think too hard on that, I join the lunch crowd in the dining room, my eyes finding Oakley.
He’s smiling as he chats with Remi, hands flying along with his spoken words, his leather cowboy hat hanging off the back of his chair. There’s an overwhelming rush of fondness that floods me as I stare at my friend, this man I’ve known all my life, who’s so much a part of my existence it’s hard to see where he ends and I begin.
Can I imagine spending my life without Oakley?
No. No, I can’t.
Chapter 20
Oakley
