But I kept silent, stuck in what might have been grief over a failed marriage. Except losing Laura wasn’t what hurt the most. It was finding out I don’t know myself nearly as well as I thought I did. And wondering if I made the wrong choice so long ago.
But my choices brought me Wendy. And even if I regret so very much, I’ll never regret that.
“I’m not sad about my divorce,” I speak aloud, and Colton stills. “I’m torn up over all the years things should have been different. I can’t get that time back. And… I’m scared maybe I won’t make the right choice for my future.”
My brother appraises me for a long moment. “Noah and I were at each other’s throats for over fifteen years. You know why? A mistake someone else made. Life is messy, Law. It’s never a perfect road. All you can do is travel down the one that feels right for you. Looking in the rearview won’t accomplish a thing except forcing you to lose sight of what’s in front of you.”
“Shit,” I mutter, shocked at my brother’s insightful advice.
Colton chuckles, tipping his hat back as he holds my gaze. The sharp blue of his eyes is a feature each of my brotherspossesses. I’ve always been the odd man out in that regard. “You’ve got a lot of life left to live, Law, God willing. But being afraid of it won’t make it what you want it to be.”
“You’re saying making mistakes is better than not making any choices at all.”
“I am. Mistakes can be fun sometimes.”
Colton bounces his eyebrows, and I huff a laugh.
“But it’ll work out for you,” he goes on. “I know it.”
“How so?” I ask, wanting badly to believe him.
His smile quirks at the corner. “Well, you’ve already started chasing your happiness, haven’t you? Even brought a little bit of it home with you.”
My gaze searches the fields for Oakley, although I don’t see him at the moment. My brother chuckles, standing.
“Yep. Knew it. You’re gonna be okay, Law.”
“Thanks, Colt. I appreciate it. I really do.”
He inclines his head. “Mhm. Now stop being a dumbass and come talk to us when you need it. We’re family. We’ll always have your back.”
I nod, my throat tight, and Colton walks off down the deck. He bypasses the stairs altogether and jumps to the grass below, whistling a tune that reminds me of Ash and hearts of gold.
My gaze returns to the far fields, the mountains set behind them. Small flecks of black dot the countryside, the cattle so far away I can barely see them, even if I squint. Oakley is somewhere out there, tending to the herd, a cowboy by trade and at the very heart of him. He’s always been a caretaker. Looking after animals, me, my daughter, even that cow he claims to hate.
I count myself lucky to have him in my life.
And I’m not letting him get away again.
Oakley is in the kitchen when I enter his house, the man’s hair wet, even though it’s far past the usual time he showers after work. I have an idea what caused the delay when I notice all his extra furniture and possessions gone from where they were piled near the dining table.
“Got everything donated?” I ask.
He nods as I join him in the kitchen, a pot on the stove perfuming the air with the savory aroma of tomatoes and herbs. “I’m officially down to three spatulas, which is still more than plenty. Wendy coming tonight?”
I shake my head, leaning against the counter as Oakley dumps spaghetti into a boiling pot of water. “She’s at a friend’s.”
“A boy’s?”
I raise an eyebrow at his implication. “Number one, you really think I’d give permission for my seventeen-year-old daughter to stay with a boyfriend, if she had one, unchaperoned for the night? Number two, your question is placing a lot of assumptions on a not-yet-woman who’s given you no indication her preference is for boys. Number three, if my daughter is determined to do something untoward with a person of any gender, she’ll find a way.”
“Untoward?” Oakley whispers.
“But to answer your question, not a boy. Her friend Chloe. And the twowillbe chaperoned for the night. Stir your sauce, Oakley.”
“Jesus,” he mutters, spinning to stir the tomato sauce. He looks at me with a curious expression. “You think Wendy might be sexually active?”
I fight my cringe. “I think she could well be, even though she claims she’s not. We’ve had every talk under the sun, and I trust my daughter to be safe, even if I don’t trust her to tell me each and every possible bad decision she’s made in her life.”
