She stood there, frozen, watching Olivia’s and Dev’s retreating backs as they walked toward the car without waiting for her. Then she turned, too, her feet carrying her back inside, the light and noise both overpowering and strangely muted.
She spotted Nora almost immediately, standing with Jeff, her arms around his waist as he smiled down at her. Merritt hesitated, not wanting to interrupt their moment, but Nora waved her over.
“That was a blast,” Nora gushed. “I’m so glad we came. And look,” she said, pulling out her phone. “I won the table.”
“And about ten other listings,” Jeff said, with good-natured exasperation.
“That’s amazing,” Merritt said, a little robotically, then pulledherself together. “Thank you for showing up, and for being so generous. I know everyone here really appreciates it.”
“It was our pleasure. Really.” Nora glanced at her phone. “We should probably get out of here. Do you need a lift home, or are you going with your sister?”
Merritt felt her face redden. “Uh, no. I mean, yeah. They already left. A ride home would be great.”
Nora turned to Jeff. “Are you good riding back with the rest of them, so Merritt and I can have a few more minutes to catch up?”
Jeff nodded, then pressed a kiss to her forehead before disappearing into the crowd.
The two of them made their way through the parking lot, the lights on a sleek silver sedan flashing as Nora unlocked it from a distance. “Are you celebrating with Niko tonight?” she asked, sliding into the driver’s seat.
Merritt was quiet, busying herself with putting on her seatbelt.
“I think I have to end it,” she said, almost to herself, no longer able to ignore the lump of dread in her stomach that had been expanding ever since she’d seen Olivia’s face. She’d hoped saying it out loud would give her some relief, but it only made her feel worse.
Nora let out a peal of startled laughter. “I feel like I missed a few steps here.”
Merritt sighed and gave her the briefest outline of Dev and Olivia’s long-standing objections to her and Niko’s union, their decision to go for it anyway, and her confrontation with Olivia that evening. “They think the whole thing is destined to crash and burn. And I’m not totally convinced they’re wrong.”
“Why do you think that?”
She shook her head. “I don’t know how to explain it. He’sso sweet, and genuine, and, like…earnest. I don’t think he has a critical bone in his body. I mean, you saw him tonight, he’sliterallyMr. Crested Peak. The whole town loves him.”
“I think I see the issue here,” Nora replied dryly, flipping her blinker on as they paused at a stop sign.
Merritt cast a sidelong glance at her. “What?”
“I’ve never seen you go for anyone like that. You like a mean, pretentious, neurotic, self-centered intellectual. Or an unhinged, unshowered, chain-smoking, carve-your-name-into-their-chest-the-first-night-you-meet-them dirtbag.”
“Wow,” Merritt said with a laugh. “That was upsettingly specific.”
“Am I wrong?”
Merritt let out a defeated exhale. “I don’twantto, they just always seem to find me. They’re the two wolves living inside me.”
“Well, there are other wolves in the sea. Or, wherever they are.”
Merritt snorted.
“You said this is just until he leaves, right?” Nora asked. “Just for fun?”
“In theory.”
“Then what’s the problem?”
“I’mthe problem,” Merritt said wearily. “I’m always the problem. I don’t know if I know how to keep it fun.” She paused, gathering the courage to say what she’d barely been able to admit to herself, much less to Niko. “The way I feel about him…it’s overwhelming. It feels like we’re deluding ourselves that we’ll be able to have a clean break. I’m afraid of fucking him up, and I’m afraid of fucking myself up again.”
“You say that like it’s out of your control.” Nora’s voice was gentle.
“It feels that way, sometimes. But this is a different kind of out of control than usual. It’s not scary, it’s…exciting. Which is scary.” Merritt laughed ruefully, looking out the window. “God, listen to me. I sound like a teenager.”
