“I understand on some level. One of my brothers recently came home from a treatment program. Same thing—he overdosed but it was intentional.”
I glance at him. “Was the job too much?”
Wraith shakes his head. “No. I think it was something he hasn’t really shared with the rest of us yet, but maybe my boss knows. They have a unique relationship.” He pulls his hair back from his face and retwists his bun. “We all have to learn how to engage with him again.”
“It’s challenging. You don’t want to baby them or suffocate them, but you want them to know how much you care, and you need to pay attention because you missed the signs before.”
“Yeah,” he grunts. “We all feel bad about missing the signs.”
“I’m sorry you’re dealing with that.”
“It’s okay.”
I notice how he shifts away from me in his seat, turning tolook out the window. Maybe he’s more than I want to write him off as. More than a cold-blooded killer. He has a family and people he loves. He’s smart and interesting. Funny sometimes.
No, Pax. Remember the cold-blooded killer part. You can’t turn a blind eye to that. If anyone found out…
My attention snags on the exit sign that leads to our quasi-vacation home. It’s more of a shack than anything, but Mom saved up for a long time to buy it from her cousin, and she was so proud of it. So we keep it, and Boone has spent the most time here.
“We didn’t see the rental car on the way here,” I note. “Do you think he maybe went back to it again and made it to the property?”
“Let’s find out.”
Driving down the gravel road that leads to the house, I keep an eye out for the rental car as I have the entire drive here, but there’s nothing. When we arrive at the property, my heart sinks. I knew he wouldn’t be here, but I sure fucking hoped I was wrong.
Slamming my hands on the steering wheel, I grunt, “Fuck.” My watch buzzes with a notification. “Fucking great. It’s getting late and I have early practice. What the fuck am I supposed to do now, Wraith? What the fuck?”
“Okay, breathe. This is where you need to trust me. I literally find people for a living. I can find Boone.”
“Do I have a choice?”
“No.” He puts his hand on my cheek and I let him, losing myself in his eyes for a moment. I don’t know how this man calms me so easily, but I can’t deny that he does. “You go get some rest and put all of this out of your mind. Focus on your job and leave this in my hands. I’ll keep you updated.”
Closing my eyes, I swallow past the lump in my throat, leaning forward to press my forehead to Wraith’s. “I want to hate you so bad. I want to tell you to go away and that I never want to see youagain.”
“I know.”
“But I can’t. I need you.”
I open my eyes and pull back slightly, unsure what I’m going to see in his expression, but the warmth I find twists my insides. It’s been a long time since I’ve felt such a strong connection to someone. Maybe I’ve never even felt this before. I’ve had my share of fun and a few casual situationships over the years, but nothing this intense and… well, perfect. The chemistry between us is powerful, but somehow, I have to walk away from it all.
Wraith tilts his head and presses a soft kiss to my lips. It’s nothing like the hard, rough kiss we shared earlier in the motel. There’s no anger behind it, no frustration, but there is plenty of heat. I’m so screwed.
“I… Bouche, I want to fix this. Not just because he’s your brother, but because it’s the right thing to do.” He chuckles darkly. “I guess I do have a moral compass.”
His words shouldn’t cause any hope to bloom inside me, but fuck me, they do.
“I believe you,” I admit. “I trust you with this.”
“Good. I won’t stop until I find him.”
“I just hope he’s alive when you do.”
“Me too, Bouche.”
“Could you, um…” I let my request sit for a second before continuing. “Could you try calling me Pax or Paxon please? The fans, the public, they call me Bouche. That’s not who I am. Not with you.”
“I can do that.” Wraith leans in and kisses me again. “Pax.”
