“I want to tell you not to worry about that, to stay in the moment.”
“But that’s not fair, is it?”
“It’s not?”
“No,” he said with a frown. “Because if you want me to be in the moment, if you want me to enjoy it, I need to know you’re doing the same, or at least trying to. If you’re doing shit just to please me, and not what you want, it’s going to fuck it up for me. Reciprocity needs to be there for everyone, or it’s lame.”
“Lame,” I said with a chuckle.
“Yes, lame!”
“Starting to feel like I’m back in elementary school,” I snorted.
“I’m being serious.”
“I know, give me a minute to think.”
“You have to think?”
I smiled. “I know, it sounds odd, but yes. I have to sort through my feelings and figure out what’s going on in my head.”
He stared at me for a moment before grunting. “Okay.”
It was odd, taking a second in what should have been a heated moment, to sort through my feelings, but that was the nature of the beast. I had, after all, figured out I was genuinely attracted to him and that everything we’d done so far had been exactly what I’d wanted and had enjoyed. So that just left the question; did I want to go without a condom because I thought it would give him the most pleasure, or because it was something I genuinely wanted to do?
I looked down at the two of us, and I was amused to see that despite being interrupted, he was still hard. I had joked that he had every right to be proud of what he was working with,and that was still true. It was enough to see him there, hard and wanting to be inside me, but holding back because...well, because he wasn’t here because he wanted to get laid or to feel special or wanted, but because...he wanted to be withme.
It was the kind of intimacy that had been sorely lacking in my life for years, and it was being offered to me. So, what did I want? Did I want him to fuck me? That answer was an easy yes. I could feel it in the way my gut tightened in anticipation whenever I looked at his cock and thought about it being inside me. Did I want to use a condom? I would if he was uncomfortable going bare, but he was clearly not. So, what did that leave me with?
And then the answer came just as easily, because all I needed was to think about what it would be like to have him inside me,justhim. No condom would let me feel him as totally as if there was nothing. And while I wasn’t fixated on the idea of having someone come inside me, and it was definitely something I’d charged extra for in the past, this was personal. This was me accepting not only that I could still desire someone, but that the idea of them fucking me with their bare cock and coming inside me was...erotic.
“Takes ya this long?” he asked, and I had to laugh.
“Shut up and fuck me already,” I said with a snort, wrapping my hand around his dick that was being a lot more patient than he was. “I want you to fuck me, and I want you to come inside me, as deep as you want, or pull out and come on my face. And get that frown off your face, I’m allowed not to have a preference without it being some psychological issue that needs to be addressed.”
That at least made him snort, and he leaned over to root around in one of the drawers under the bed, coming up with a bottle of lube. Grinning, I snatched it, and in his surprise, I took advantage and pushed so he fell on his back to stare up at me with wide, blinking eyes. Still feeling smug, I climbed over himsmoothly and opened the lube. Taking his hand, I stared into his eyes as I applied lube to his fingers and then guided his hand to my ass.
He didn’t need more instruction than that, and I used the lube to reach down and take hold of his cock as his fingers pushed into me, spreading me open easily. I could feel his shaft throb against my grip when his fingers entered me, and that was just as enticing as the feel of him inside me. I had no idea if this was what he was normally like or if it was just for me because this was a different experience for him, but if it was the former, then I understood why people came back.
I could tell how impatient he was, but also how much he was holding back as we slowly prepared each other. Well, he was preparing me as he added another finger. In contrast, I was teasing him by slowly stroking his lube-covered dick and occasionally focusing on the head, so he stopped fingering me and squirmed with soft noises of pleasure.
He was clearly comfortable having me lead the charge, so when the time came, I pulled his fingers from me and hovered over him. Using his body as leverage with one hand, I used the other to steady the base of his cock and push back, straining at the resistance until the head of his cock popped inside me with a flash of momentary discomfort followed by pleasure.
Clay made a low noise as I sank onto his dick, rocking so I took a little more of him at a time but always kept moving. I moved a little faster than I should have, but when I felt my ass press against his hips and could feel his entire length inside me, I didn’t regret it. I was happy I’d decided to do without a condom, as I swear I could feel every inch without the ‘rubber’ barrier between our bodies.
That was confirmed when I shifted my legs so I could properly move with him inside me. He swore softly the first time I picked myself up to lower myself down, taking him from headto root in one roll of my hips, and his hands slapped down onto my thighs and gripped tightly. It was probably my imagination, but I would swear I could feel the way his dick throbbed inside me as I continued pumping my hips, taking him as deep as possible while I watched his face.
After a couple of minutes, I realized he was lost in the moment and didn’t intend to stop me riding him and take over. I began to pick up pace, my smooth hip rolling becoming more like controlled bouncing. Not that I was going to complain at the sight of him, his lips parted, eyes heavily lidded as I took him over and over inside me.
This wasn’t like the times I had found pleasure in the work I was doing,pushing myself to enjoy something with some non-paying stranger. No, the physical pleasure was more or less the same, but I was enjoying it, I was savoring it. Just like I was savoring watching the emotions pass over his face, the way he was giving in to the moment and forgetting about everything except our bodies meeting. And I could feel the way he filled me perfectly, the way he trusted me completely as I built up speed and power in the movements of my hips.
His breathing was becoming erratic. I knew he was close, and it took a surprising amount of self-control not to change my pace or method. It was when the asshole reached up and took hold of my dick, which I’d forgotten all about, that I found my self-control starting to slip. Before I could so much as protest as the sudden surge in pleasure threw me off my rhythm, he was moving, shifting me so I was forced to lean forward onto my hands, my hips still lowered so his cock was inside me.
Clay’s hand continued stroking me, but the other gripped my hips as he took over, thrusting up into me and making me cry out in surprise and pleasure. The combination of his cock thrusting as he stroked me fervently was all it took for me to forget all about savoring anything and instead, I found myself lost in theoverwhelming pleasure. Panting, I bent down and kissed him as he pumped into me, making me cry out again in warning before my body went wire tight and I jerked in his hand.
I came hard, splattering his chest all the way up to his neck and chin, forcing me to sit down on his dick. He let out a huff that turned into a groan, pressing his forehead against mine as he panted. Deep inside me, I could feel him pulsing as he came, his breathing coming in steady pants before he growled, his hips twitching against my ass.
“You were waiting for me to get off,” I accused when we were finally able to breathe again.
