“I’ve always been obsessed with the sky. It was inevitable, I guess, considering most of my family works in aviation, and my name literally means celestial. When I was a kid, and my friends’ parents were taking their phones and tablets away so they’d sleep, my dads had to take my telescope away, or I’d be awake all night, looking up and making notes about what I could see. The stars have alwaysgrounded me, ironically,” she says with a wry smile. “They’re hard to see in Chicago, but I still have my telescope.”
“You should’ve brought it. The stars are magical here.”
“Next time,” she says, knocking the breath from me.
Next time?I suppose it makes sense that Bryan may want to redo the trip someday, since only Este actually made it here. But I hadn’t considered that meant I’d probably see her again. I have no right to feel as relieved as I do.
I want to ask her where her favorite place to see the stars is, what tattoo she’d get for Sloane. I want to keep talking to her, to learn everything there is to know, but she yawns, and I know she needs to sleep. So, I turn onto my back and hold out my arm, inviting her in.
Este hesitates for only a moment before she cuddles into my side, laying her head on my chest. It feels right, having her here. I allow myself to kiss her head, and Este lets out a tension-filled breath, until I feel her body relax against me.
“Good night, angel.”
“Good night, Daddy.”
Jesus Christ. “Este.”
“Shh. I’m trying to sleep.”
I close my eyes and, for the first time in a long time, I fall asleep smiling.
The air blowing from the heater is lukewarm, and the wipers only have two working settings—off or lightning speed—soI have to choose between squinting through a blotchy windshield or aggressive wipers. But I love this car. We’ve been so many places together, made so many memories. The first thing Georgie did when she got in the car was flick through the folder of CDs to find her favorite and shove it in the CD player. It’s scratched from being played so many times, and it skips sometimes until she bangs the stereo, but it wouldn’t be a drive with my sisters if they weren’t singing ABBA. Georgie at the top of her lungs, Shay half-singing from the back seat while she scribbles a recipe idea for some kind of layer cake on an old gas station receipt she found in the footwell.
There’s never a quiet moment with Georgie and Shay around, and that’s exactly how I like it. When they’re not here, I like the quiet. But when it’s the three of us, their energy recharges me. It’s been that way for as long as I can remember. They’re a part of me. No matter how far they are, I can feel them, and they can feel me, but we always feel better when we’re together.
Georgie turns the music down and looks over her shoulder. “You never told us what the psychic said at your work party last night.”
“It was just generic bullshit, as always,” Shay replies, her voice laced with skepticism. “Apparently I should keep an eye out for black cats, and I’m going to marry someone who goes to Berkley.”
“Could be worse. She could’ve said you were going to die some tragic way,” I offer, and she snorts.
“Even worse—she told the new busboy he should try a different deodorant.”
Before Georgie or I can respond, a gust catches the car, and it’s all I can do to stay in my lane. I curse, gripping the wheel and slowing down. Thankfully, the road is dead, but the weather has been shit lately, and there’s rubble all over the place. I almost suggested we go somewhere else, but we’ve gone to the same restaurant on our birthday every year for as long as we can remember, and our parents are meeting us there. Even the year Georgie and Shay lived in Paris, they came home for a long weekend over our birthday. A little bad weather isn’t enough to stop us, but it is enough to slow me down. I insisted we leave early so we didn’t have to rush.
Georgie doesn’t turn the music back up; she and Shay sit quietly as I navigate the winding, cliffside road. If not for the silence, we might not have heard it. A deep rumble that sounds like it’s coming from miles away.
“Is that an earthquake?” Shay murmurs from the back, but I can’t feel anything.
I round a bend in the road, squinting as the noise gets louder. It’s not until I see a dust cloud forming that I realize it’s a rockslide. It’s hard to see in the dark, but I think the whole side of the cliff is crumbling.
“Fuck,” I growl, pressing my foot down and trying to speed past this stretch of road. If I can just get a bit farther…
The bang is deafening as the mass of stone batters the passengers’ side of the car. The sound echoes in my head as we’re forced off the road, and, when it clears, Shay is screaming.
Georgie isn’t.
I turn the wheel like it’ll do anything when we’re nose down, falling down the ravine. I’m vaguely aware of my seatbelt biting into my chest, the only thing holding me together. My eyes won’t open when I try to turn and look at Georgie. And Ineedto look at Georgie, because I can’t feel her. I can’t…
“Nico.”
Why can’t I feel her?
“Nico.”
Oh god. Oh god. Oh?—
“Nico!”
