“You used a company credit card,” Lauren shot back, but her face, which had never told a lie, was betraying her in bright, red, hyper color. Her eyes darted to mine again. Now was not the time to look to me for comfort.
Parker shot from his chair and stared me down. “You told her about the four wheelers. That blonde hair on your shoulder on Sunday morning was hers, wasn’t it? And I swear I saw Lauren’s truck down the street from your house the other night, when you were supposedly off doing errands for your grandparents. You’ve been doing a lot of errands lately. The cookies!” Parker swung around and pointed back at Lauren. “You were there that night, weren’t you?”
“Will someone please tell me what is going on?” John banged on his desk, and Parker whirled around to face him.
“Lauren and Clay are secretly dating.”
It suddenly got really quiet. Barry shut his computer with a snap and stood. “John, I’m gonna go. Call me later.” The man sent me a look of quiet empathy before walking out the door and closing it behind him.
This was not going to end well. Not that I regretted any of it except for the timing. I made the mistake of conveying my lack of regret to Lauren in one brief smoldering look. I needed her to know I didn’t blame her. Her terrible lack of deceit was one of the things I liked best about her. She raised her eyebrows back at me like I’d lost my mind. Maybe I had.
We were interrupted by John smacking his desk again. “What exactly has been going on between you two?”
“That’s why she didn’t want to sign a no-dating policy. She was already breaking it.” Parker stared at us, suddenly looking suspicious. “And Lauren was the one who suggested we add Clay as an owner. It was her idea. How exactly did that come about?”
Just like that, the temperature in the room dropped fifty degrees.
John locked eyes with me. I felt all his mistrust and all the insinuations Parker was making. And it hurt. A lot. It was rejection. And not belonging. And feeling like a guest in your own house. This was my work home and they were my family. I was safe here. Or so I’d thought. I could take anger, and I could take surprise. But this… I didn’t want to look at Lauren. I didn’t want her pity, or worse, to see her question my motives along with them. I didn’t want her torn between choosing them or me. I never should have put her in that position.
For several long seconds, I warred with whether to explain myself, but it all felt so humiliating. I sighed, letting out something I thought I’d never say. “Don’t worry. I quit.”
I turned to go, but Lauren jumped up and blocked the door before I could leave it. “Stop it. Just stop it,” she pled. “Nobody say another word that can’t be taken back.”
Too late for that. I couldn’t stay. Damage control would have to be a Harwood affair, and I wasn’t a Harwood. I gently moved Lauren’s arm out of the way, avoiding her pleas to stay, and ran.
It was the first time I’d ever ditched work. I’d given everything to this place, but for the next few hours, I didn’t want to think about any of it. I texted Evan to let him know which skid steers still needed oil changes, and then I powered down my phone and drove off.
28
___________
Lauren
It didn’t take Dad long to recover from his shock. As soon as Clay left, he launched into a long-winded lecture about how this was just like what happened with Boyce, and how he couldn’t believe I could do something like this to the company. Again.
But this was nothing like Boyce. Yes, Boyce had been a good guy, and probably a good fit for me. But I hadn’t loved him enough because I hadn’t allowed myself to.
I hadn’t trusted him with my whole heart because I was too afraid of what might happen if I let someone in. If people couldn’t see the real me, then they couldn’t judge me, and they couldn’t control that part of me, and my feelings were safe. But there was loneliness in surface relationships, and it took Clay coaxing more out for me to see it.
I did feel more with him. Jenny had been more right than she’d realized.
“How could you not see this coming?” Dad asked, dropping into his desk chair and putting his head in his hands. “Lauren, what were you thinking?”
I had to stop checking the hallway for Clay. He wasn’t coming back, and the only one out there was Paisley, who was surely listening in. Whatever, I was past caring who knew our business. I’d go and make things right with Clay, but not until I’d cleaned up the mess here. And, boy, was it a mess.
I turned around in the doorway to face my dad. My body shook with the control it took not to lose it completely. “This time is different, Dad. This time, I quit, too. I’m so ashamed of this family. Clay has never done anything to betray your trust before. Except fall for me. And for your information, I thought about Clay having part ownership before we started dating. I told him so, and he brushed me off. In fact, he forbid me from saying anything, but I did it anyway. Because I’m a Harwood and we’re a bunch of hotheads.”
I turned to Parker, who was squirming. I was about to make him squirm even more. “Did you really just tell your best friend you think he’s trying to weasel favor in the company through me? That is not only stupid, it’s cruel. Yeah, he lied to you about us, but that doesn’t change you being a bad friend. And Dad, the night Clay and I got together was the night of my double date with Noble. I found my guy, just not the one you expected. And I choose him over the company. I choosehim.”
This weight that had been sitting on my shoulders for I didn’t know how long, lifted the moment I said it. If I had a mike, I would have dropped it. I wasn’t sure what I’d do after working for Sun Valley my whole life, but I needed to go find Clay more than I needed to figure that out right now.
I ran out and jumped in my truck. The beauty started right up, and I peeled out of the parking lot, waiting impatiently for the slow gate out of the property to open up for me. Clay didn’t answer his phone, but that didn’t worry me until I reached his house and he wasn’t there. I even did the whole jumping on my tip-toes and checking through the garage door windows to see if his truck was inside the garage. It wasn’t.
He didn’t answer the door, and he still wasn’t answering his phone. I sank down onto his front lawn and put my shaky hands together. I’d told my dad and Parker they were a bunch of hotheads, and I’d chewed them out, and then left, because that’s what I did best. I was the biggest hothead of them all. Maybe I should start thinking about all the stupid decisions that led me here.
I didn’t regret speaking up for Clay about ownership, but I certainly hadn’t respected him in the way I went about it. And my constant warring with Parker was the reason the meeting today had gone downhill so fast. I had tattled on Parker’s latest purchase, and he had tattled on my relationship with Clay. It was a continuation of the same battle that had always led us nowhere, and we’d just let it ruin the one person who cared about us the most.
Clay had always been the glue in the middle, holding us all together, but that wasn’t a position anyone could hold forever. Or should hold.
