Chapter 4
Doug
“Me? And you?”
Of course there was a secret reason she’d dragged me into this. I just never imagined a scenario where she’d want me as a boyfriend, even a fake one. I wasn’t sure what to feel.
She nodded, staring at the table top where a hundred faded business cards were entombed in heavy glass.
“And you couldn’t have told me before I signed on?”
The waitress came with our food, saving Willa from having to answer right away. She ordered an orange juice to go with her pancakes and avoided looking at me. I could see her embarrassment mingled with uncomfortable shame, but I wouldn’t feel sorry for her. I’d trusted her, and my gut had let me down. Willa had an angle to play, just like everyone else in this business.
She frowned. “I was afraid you wouldn’t do it.”
“Wouldn’t date you?” I couldn’t think of a single man who wouldn’t want to date her. I stared down at my food and took a small bite. All I registered was its chewiness, since my taste buds had decided to turn off. “I wouldn’t have minded if you’d just told me. Now I’m always going to be wondering what else you’re keeping from me.”
“I’m not keeping anything else from you. I swear.”
I still wanted to trust her, and that irritated me more than anything. I wasn’t taking her promise as gospel, but I needed to think this through before I let my hurt feelings decide for me. I’d thought of us as friends. I’d thought she’d wanted me along as a friend. Right now I felt like a pawn, someone she was comfortable manipulating.
“So, me or Justin Justice, huh?”
She gave an uncomfortable little laugh. “Never him. Alan Alders wasn’t happy. He wanted it to be Justin, and when I said no, he suggested several guys to take that last judge spot, but they’re all … terrible people. If you back out, he’s ready to contact one of them to step in.” She reached out and grasped my hand. “Doug, I’m sorry.”
“Is this part of the relationship thing? Are we starting now?” I was half-joking, but Willa was not a touchy-feely type, and it was weird to feel her hand in mine with that contrite expression on her face. Cameras were hiding somewhere, I knew it.
She pulled her hand back. “No, we’re not starting now. But we should discuss … how it’s going to work.”
I glanced over the booth divider, checking the table behind me and in front of her. The one behind me was empty, and the one behind her held a young couple wrangling with an unruly two-year-old and a laughing older child egging the toddler on. Our conversation was as safe as it was going to get.
“I would assume the first rule is we don’t talk about this being fake while we’re in public.”
She nodded. “Absolutely. No one can know it’s not real.”
“But, how long would we be acting? The show might go on for several seasons.”
She’d just taken a bite of pancake and I waited for her to finish chewing. Even her chewing was elegant and precise. Willa knew she was beautiful, but could she imagine the scope of it, of what she was asking of me? Maybe she didn’t have any real feelings for anybody, but I wasn’t sure I could go through the motions of a relationship with her and feel nothing.
“I thought of that. It would only be for this season and a little bit afterward. After our ‘break up’ we’d just flirt with each other on air, so viewers would always wonder if we might get back together.”
“You’ve thought of everything.”
Her shoulders dropped. “Again, I’m sorry I kept you in the dark about it. If it makes you feel any better, Alan doesn’t know I’m telling you, and he wouldn’t approve.”
I put down my fork. “Wait, what? Are you saying he’s hoping I’ll think it’s all real?”
Her mouth dropped open, but nothing came out. Eventually, it turned into a long sigh. “That’s part of the rules, Doug. If you do this, even Alan has to think it’s real on your end. I’m so—”
“Don’t say you’re sorry again. And for the record, that’s something else you were keeping from me, despite swearing otherwise.” If I was my mother, I’d stand up at this point, throw my napkin down, and stomp regally out of the restaurant. But I was not my mother, and I tried to do what was best for others and not just what was best for me. Unfortunately, that was how I got suckered into this mess.
“What do you want to do, Doug? If you want to back out now, I’ll try to help you. Obviously, you’re not contractually obligated to date me.”
But if I didn’t, Alan would get rid of me. That was the unsaid part. There was no way out. Not really. Alan had his hands in all sorts of things. He could make careers, but that also meant he could break them, even a career as inconsequential as mine.
“How involved is Alan going to be in our … ruse?” I couldn’t bring myself to say relationship.
“I’ll handle him. He wanted me with Justin Justice but he didn’t get that. I made it clear it was you or no one. He knows he can’t have everything he wants.”
