Chapter 17
Willa
I’d spent way too much time worrying about how things would be when I saw Doug the next morning. However, it wasn’t nearly as awkward as I’d expected. We had our roles to play in front of the cameras, so we did what we always did with our teasing and name-calling and discussing the contestant’s progress. The only thing different was a few lingering looks I did my utmost not to respond to, and the question in his eyes. I couldn’t even begin to answer it. Kissing him changed everything. I was terrified of the happiness that bubbled up inside when I thought of it. But there would be time later to explore all that when our whole lives weren’t dictated by a script.
First, I had to deal with the scriptmaker. I didn’t have to seek Alan out because he found me first. He pulled me into his makeshift office about midday and closed the door.
“I’ve had a long talk with Justin.”
And all my euphoria fizzled into nothingness. Alan was gifted like that.
I mentally yanked out my hair and moved over to one of the plastic chairs against the wall, hopefully revealing nothing in my face. I had suspected there had been backdoor dealings between Alan and Justin, so it was almost a relief to hear it confirmed, no matter how much I hated it. After that last episode with Doug’s mom, I figured Justin wouldn’t keep quiet.
Alan stared me down. “Justin is not interested in any more surprises where you’re concerned, and since keeping him in the dark is no longer an option, we came up with a new plan.”
Their plan. This couldn’t be good.
“What’s new about it?” I asked.
“First, let’s talk about the pictures of you and Doug in front of his apartment. It’s a good sign. The media is seeking you out without any interference from me, but it’s also bad. We need to keep people wondering if you’ll end up with Justin or Doug. Right now it’s too lopsided in Doug’s favor.”
I steeled myself to have no reaction one way or another. “But that was the original plan. Doug and I would end up together. Why not let that play out?”
“Because the audience will get bored with it by the end of the season. We’ve lost the will-they-won’t-they storyline. We’ve got to keep them guessing by dropping crumbs for the Team Justin fans.”
“How is that supposed to help my ‘likeability issues’ as you so kindly put it when we first started down this road? By not choosing, you’re portraying me as a fickle tramp.”
Alan slowly shook his head at me. “We’re portraying you as conflicted. And what could be a better story than overcoming Justin’s charms to choose the guy who’s better for your heart? That’s the storyline we’re creating, and at the end, you’ll get Doug like you wanted. Justin is onboard with this. He’s prepared to let you choose Doug at the end, as long as he gets some good publicity out of it. Let’s make it work to the best advantage for all of us.”
I ran a hand through my hair. “Give me details, Alan. What does dropping crumbs to the Team Justin crowd look like?” I wasn’t fooled by his rational explanations. He was the one dangling a carrot now, and all I had to do was jump through all his little hoops to get it. Maybe the carrot was real, and maybe it was not. I couldn’t quite believe Justin was okay with me choosing Doug in the end.
Alan shifted in his seat a little, the only indication he was uncomfortable with my request for more details. “Just do the same things you’ve already been doing. On camera banter. Spend a little time with each one. But I’ll need you to act like Justin isn’t something that crawled out from under your bed. Use those acting skills and warm up to him. We’re going to have you and Justin learn a couple’s routine and perform it in a couple weeks.”
“Okay. I can do that.”
I stomped out of the meeting more frustrated than when I’d gone in. I needed to be in control of this ship, but the harder I tried the more I messed it up. I was supposed to leave Justin in the dark, but I’d told him practically everything, giving him all the power, and I’d chosen Doug so I could stay detached, but I was anything but detached. Kissing Doug was not meh. Kissing Doug had been world-tilting. Whether I dated Justin or not would have been a pesky detail if feelings weren’t involved. Stinking feelings.
I stayed with the contestants as long as I possibly could until the crew fetched me for dance practice with Justin. We’d be learning the new routine Alan had mentioned.
As soon as the choreographer demonstrated what she wanted, I knew I was in trouble. This lyrical routine told the journey of a disinterested girl slowly giving into the charms of her male dance partner.
Justin and I worked through each move, only making eye contact when the dance called for it. I had no idea what to say to him. He was being too quiet. Normally he cracked jokes and talked endlessly, but not today. Maybe he was afraid of sending me over the edge after my meeting with Alan. Maybe he was just concentrating really hard. Lyrical wasn’t his strong suit, though he wasn’t half bad with enough practice. He had the strength and form for it.
“Foreheads together, and hold.” The choreographer clapped as the music died out. “That’s the whole thing. If you want to end with a kiss, you can do that as well.”
I pulled away and shook my head. “Foreheads together is enough for now.” Showing interest didn’t mean I wanted to kiss him over and over as we practiced.
Justin fixed his hair in the mirror as if he had no opinion. Whatever.
We ran through it for the next hour.
“Okay, one more time,” the choreographer said. “Full strength, performance level. I want to see the longing in your faces.”
We started at position one and I gathered all my concentration. My lines were perfect. We did all the lifts. By the end of it, we were both breathing heavily and smiling. We touched foreheads and stayed there while our heart rates slowed. And then Justin tilted his head slightly and left a soft kiss on my lips, lingering there.
I came out of character and jumped away, causing him to drop me. My frustration and anger flared, but at the last second I remembered the cameras on us. “You startled me,” I said, adding a coy, self-conscious smile, as if the kiss hadn’t been unwelcome. This was one of those crumb drops Alan had been talking about, and if I didn’t use this opportunity, I’d have to create new ones later.
“I was caught up in the moment,” Justin said with a half-smile. Like he hadn’t just done that on purpose. He held out his hands, and I took them, letting him lift me back on my feet. Motion at the door caught my attention. I turned just in time to see the back of Doug’s head as he was walking off. Alan couldn’t have planned it better. Maybe he did plan it. Filled with disgust, I gathered up my things and rushed to go find Doug.
