PROLOGUE
Bex looked at herself in the mirror and took a steadying breath. Okay, this wasn’t a disaster; she didn’t really hate the dress and think it made her look ridiculous, like a mountain of marshmallows that had been swallowed by a cloud – she was just panicking. The nerves were getting to her. That was all.
It was probably no surprise with her sister, Briony, being so cynical about the idea of the wedding. Bex wanted Briony to be excited about her big day, and to love Liam almost as much as she did, but she didn’t. If anything, Briony seemed to actively dislike him.
‘It’s quite common for brides-to-be to have a wobble about whether they’ve made the right choice at this stage.’ Susie, who owned and ran the only wedding dress shop in Port Agnes put a comforting hand on her shoulder. ‘But there’s no need for you to have any doubt. You look perfect, doesn’t she, Briony?’
‘Yes, she really does look perfect.’ Briony was younger by three years but even twins couldn’t have had a tighter bond. They had the same hazel eyes with flecks of green, but Bex had dark hair that was usually cut into a pixie style, which she had growndown past her shoulders in preparation for the wedding. Whereas Briony had long, wavy, blonde hair and freckles across her nose like the archetypal Cornish surfer she was whenever she got the chance. Bex was the sensible one, choosing to stay at home instead of going off to uni, to avoid putting any extra financial pressure on their mum. Briony was the free spirit, not really planning anything much in advance and happy to follow whatever path fate sent her down, without thinking about it too much. The fact that they were so different might have been the reason they got on so well, and there was no one Bex trusted more than her sister. Briony was saying all the right things and she was smiling, but there was something in her tone, something in the way she’d emphasised the wordlookthat didn’t feel quite right.
‘I just feel… I don’t know. Not like me.’ Bex frowned again, smoothing down the front of the dress. This was the final fitting, the last chance to make any changes, although God knows what could be done at this stage. The dress suddenly seemed to have an awful lot of ruffles. It was very of the moment, according to Susie. The noughties were about to usher in the 2010s, whatever they were going to be called. The tenties? Surely not, although right now the wordtentfelt horribly appropriate and the dress Bex had chosen suddenly seemed huge. At least on the bottom half. The top was a fitted strapless bodice, but the bottom was made up of horizontal tiers of organza, layered over one another.
‘You’re not supposed to feel like you on the wedding day, you’re supposed to feel like a princess. No one goes strolling down to Mehenick’s Bakery for a crusty cob in a dress like that!’ Bex’s mum appeared behind her in the mirror, the warmth of her smile immediately settling some of her nerves. Donna Deyes might have a very ordinary-sounding name, but she was a superhero as far as Bex was concerned; the woman who seemed able to sort any problem either of her daughters experienced, and whohad raised them for the first fifteen years of Bex’s life without much help from anyone. Least of all her deadbeat father, who had come and gone from the family home like it was a hotel with a revolving door. That was probably Donna’s only shortcoming – that she hadn’t drawn a line in the sand far sooner and told Jeffrey Davis to get out and stay out. Bex knew it was because her mother had desperately wanted the marriage to work, for her daughters’ sakes, but a clean break early on would have been so much better for them all. They wouldn’t have grown up praying for their father to return from the home of whatever woman had been keeping him occupied in the meantime, and yet dreading it too, because they knew more pain was just around the corner.
Donna had been of a different generation, and her parents had been heavily involved in the church, raising her to believe that keeping the marriage together at all costs was better for the children than admitting the whole thing had been a terrible mistake. But their parents’ toxic relationship had given both Bex and Briony a twisted perspective on what a marriage looked like, with one person doing all the work to keep the marriage going and the family afloat, emotionally, financially and practically. As for the other person, if she based it on her father’s role, it was all about making false promises, lying, cheating, letting people down, and taking a thousand times more than you gave. It might even have damaged her and Briony beyond repair, and put them off relationships forever, if it hadn’t been for two things: their mother’s unwavering devotion to them through it all, and their amazing stepfather, Ken, who had come into their lives when Donna had finally decided enough was enough.
Donna and Ken were now Bex’s benchmark for what a good marriage looked like. And her relationship with Ken had also been the catalyst to finally enable her to stop trying to win her father’s love. For years Bex had done everything she could to gether father to notice her, trying her hardest at school to make him proud, and leaping at every opportunity to see him. Even when he was living elsewhere, her mother would make arrangements for Jeffrey to visit his daughters, but nine times out of ten he’d let them down. Bex always forgave him, making excuses and believing he must have a reason, or – most damagingly of all – that it must be her fault. Briony had wised up to their father far more quickly, keeping him at arm’s length, and yet he’d still seemed to prefer his younger daughter, which had dented Bex’s self-esteem over and over again. Ken coming into her life had finally enabled Bex to see that all fault for the state of her relationship with her father lay with him.
Jeffrey had disappeared from their lives altogether once their mother had told him he could no longer come and go as he pleased, and he barely featured in Bex’s thoughts these days. Except he was still there in her subconscious, perhaps even more than she realised. It was probably the memories of their father that made Briony suspicious of Liam and so determined to believe the silly rumour that had been going around about him cheating on Bex. She’d known it couldn’t be true, even before he’d looked her in the eyes and promised her it was all just vicious gossip. Liam wouldn’t do that to her, and the doubts that were creeping in now had nothing to do with that. These feelings were down to what she’d witnessed her father put her mother through and they were manifesting themselves in something that felt a lot like fear whenever she looked at the wedding dress she’d previously loved. Despite all of that, there was no way on earth she was letting Jeffrey Davis take any more from her than he already had, and she absolutely wasn’t going to let him take the shine off the happiest day of her life. Ken would be the one giving her away and Jeffrey didn’t deserve any part in it, not even in her subconscious.
‘Thanks, Mum.’ Bex turned around and gave her mother the tightest hug. A gesture that always felt like coming home. Donna represented safety for Bex and, if her mother said it was going to be okay, it would be.
‘I can’t believe there are only twenty-two days to go!’ Bex wrote the figure with a flourish on thedays until our weddingchalkboard that hung in the kitchen of the flat she shared with her fiancé.
‘Yes, it’s coming around so fast now.’ Liam smiled, suddenly looking much younger than his three decades, like a kid with a nervous grin on the first day of school. Bex might be six years younger, but she supposed there was no age limit to feeling apprehensive about such a big occasion. The two of them were going to be the centre of everyone’s attention, and when Bex thought about that, the nerves made her stomach start to flip too. Instead, she tried to focus on the fact that she and Liam were going to be married and starting the rest of their lives together. They had so many plans that were now within touching distance. She’d saved really hard for the wedding, not wanting to put any pressure on her mum, who’d worked as many as three jobs at a time when she and Briony were growing up, just to keep a roof over their heads. She hadn’t wanted Ken to feel he needed to take any responsibility for paying for the wedding either and so, from the moment Liam had proposed two years earlier, she’d drawn up a budget to help them save for everything they were going to need. It had taken some sacrifice, not being able to go out as much any more, or go on holiday, but it had been Briony who’d seemed to find the adjustment hardest of all.
‘Are you sure you want to do this? It seems crazy wasting your early twenties saving for a wedding when you could be going outhaving fun, or heading off travelling instead of sitting home all the time like you’re already an old married woman.’ Briony had laughed, but it had felt forced; like an attempt to pass off something she meant every word of as a joke.
‘I know it’s not what you’d choose, but Iwantto get married, and have a home and family of my own.’ Bex had given her younger sister a hug then. ‘But you’re only nineteen, so I get why it seems crazy to you.’
Her explanation hadn’t stopped Briony from continuing to make those kinds of comments though and regularly checking in with Bex about whether this was what she actually wanted. Briony had asked Bex how she could be so certain Liam was ‘the one’, and she’d often point out things about him she thought were less than ideal, like how much he enjoyed ‘nights out with the boys’.
‘I thought you were the one who said we’re too young not to be going out and enjoying ourselves?’ Bex had raised her eyebrows, calling her sister out on her double standards. It was just because Briony missed Bex being as available as she had been before; always ready to go out or away on a trip. Briony had doubled down on raising her concerns after the rumours about Liam’s cheating had started circulating.
‘I just…’ Briony shook her head. ‘Don’t you ever question it when he says he’s staying round a mate’s house? I don’t know, sometimes he just reminds me of Jeffrey.’ And that had been the crux of the issue, right there – the realisation lifting the last trace of any doubt Bex might have had about Liam’s faithfulness off her shoulders. Any behaviour that reminded either of them of their father was immediately heightened and seen as an indicator of impending doom, and it meant Briony saw red flags everywhere. It was normal for someone of Liam’s age to want to go out with his mates a lot, and to sometimes prioritise that over Bex, and even saving up for the wedding. She knew she was probably a bit obsessive in that respect – once she had a plan she was going to stick to it – but she didn’t expect Liam to be as disciplined as her.
The relationship wouldn’t work if there wasn’t a bit of yin and yang, so she was happy to make a few more of the sacrifices than he did. That didn’t make her like their mother, because she waschoosingto do it, rather than being forced to do so, and there was no way Liam’s behaviour even came close to their father’s. No way. She knew Briony was just scared for her, and that her little sister’s apprehension was driven by fear of history repeating itself, so she let the comments go without turning them into an argument.
Even three years into Bex’s relationship with Liam, Briony remained guarded around him, but eventually she’d realise that Liam was nothing like their dad and would accept that he made Bex happy. She knew that was all that would matter to Briony in the end.
Their plans for after the wedding were now more exciting than she’d ever dreamt possible. The day after her dress fitting, Ken had insisted on giving her the money to pay for the wedding in its entirety and he wouldn’t take no for an answer. He’d cashed in an endowment savings plan he had towards his retirement, having worked as a carpenter for years, taking contracts on building projects and running a small business of his own on the side. Ken had no children of his own and when Bex had tried to turn down his very generous offer, he wouldn’t hear of it. He’d insisted he was nowhere near ready to retire and that he had no intention of ever fully doing so, another year or two of working life meant nothing to him as a result, but paying for Bex’s wedding did. She’d cried then and it had touched her heart in a way she’d never quite been able to find the words to express.
Now here they were, just three weeks and a day away from thewedding, and she couldn’t have been more delighted that Ken would be the one walking her down the aisle. He’d been more of a dad to her than Jeffrey had ever been, and she didn’t feel like she was missing out on anything by not having her biological father there. The day was going to be perfect. It also meant that she and Liam could start looking for a house straight away, because the money she’d saved would now form the bulk of their deposit. There was so much to look forward to.
‘Twenty-two days; it really is crazy how quickly it’s come round,’ Liam said now and she nodded, excitement making her voice come out in a much more high-pitched tone than normal when she answered him.
‘I know. Just think, this time next month, we’ll be Mr and Mrs Corrigan!’
‘Yeah. Listen, I’ve to get to work, angel, but I’ll see you tonight.’ Liam planted a kiss on her forehead, almost absentmindedly, already turning towards the door, like someone dropping their child off at school before rushing to work. But his use of the pet name he’d given her, made a warm glow settle in her chest. She was his angel and soon he’d be her husband, and they could start a whole lifetime of adventure together. Whatever little wobbles she might have about the dress, becoming his wife was something she couldn’t wait for.
Bex had never been so glad to see the end of the working day. It had been one that had tested her patience to the limit. Working as a duty manager for a holiday park in Port Tremellien sometimes required her to smile when she felt like screaming. The kind of complaints customers could come up with never ceased to amaze her. Then there were guests like the ones who’d just left,who behaved appallingly – leaving the mobile homes where they’d been staying looking like a post-apocalyptic nightmare and expecting the staff at Seaspray Holiday Park to clean up the mess they’d left behind. The Easter break had started, and the incoming guests would be wanting to check in soon. With the general manager off on a holiday of his own, it had been Bex’s job to sort it all out and it had been a very long day. She couldn’t even enjoy one of those lovelyThank God it’s Fridaymoments that people in normal jobs got to experience, because she’d be working the weekend too.
Liam understood that she often had to work late, and she’d texted him earlier in the day to say she might not make it home in time for dinner. He’d told her not to worry and that they’d get a takeaway when she got in. As it was, she’d worked a small miracle and managed to get away just half an hour after her scheduled finishing time. It meant she had a lovely evening to look forward to with Liam: dinner and a bottle of wine, followed by a film and a snuggle on the sofa. She didn’t need any more than that to be happy and she was already smiling at the thought by the time she pulled out of the car park.
She was still smiling when she pulled up outside the flat. Maybe tonight she and Liam could log on to her laptop and look at the Rightmove website to see what else had come on to the market. They’d already had a meeting with the mortgage adviser to find out how much they could borrow, and they knew their exact budget now, so they could really narrow down the search. It would be something to focus on once the wedding was out of the way, which would be great because she didn’t want to be one of those brides who felt sad and deflated once the honeymoon was over, with nothing to look forward to any more. The wedding was just the start for her and Liam.
There was music playing when she let herself into the flat andshe’d been about to call out his name, but something stopped her. The idea of catching him dancing around the living room as he sometimes did when he played his favourite music made her smile again. Although this music was slower and softer than his usual choice. Maybe he was cooking up a storm instead, awaiting her return. Either way she couldn’t wait to see him, her heart still quickening at the thought of kissing him, just as it had the very first time. Pushing open the door to the living area of the flat, her heart broke into a gallop so rapid she was scared it might burst out of her chest, but it wasn’t because she was imagining kissing Liam any more. It was because she was watching him kiss her sister.
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