I don’t want to fall back into my old ways, so by the time I’ve drained my drink, my mind is made up—my coach is right. If I’m going to make any progress, I need to meet someone for real and put it all into practice. It sounds a little clinical, maybe—but it’s true. I suddenly feel like I’m treading water, like one day Carrie will wake up and the spell will be broken, and she’ll be back to her old, bitchy ways. I need to show her that all her hard work is paying off—make sure she doesn’t give up on me.
DONOVAN:You’re right. This place is crawling with girls, let me find a good one.
I send the message, pocket my phone, and snap my head up. Still there—the blonde hasn’t budged an inch.Go for it, dude.This time, I beckon her over. She blinks slowly and jerks a finger at her chest.Who, me?
I nod.You.
As she eases her way through the crowd, my pulse quickens.Fuck—don’t tell me you’re nervous. How did that happen?
I roll my shoulders, stretching my neck from side to side.It’s just a girl. Just a girl who isn’t Carrie. Relax.
“Hey.”
She’s a little higher pitched than I expected. I’ve grown all too used to my love coach’s lower, smoother voice.
I pat the seat to my left. “What’s your name?”
“Cheyenne.”
“Nice to meet you, Cheyenne.” I smile. “Donovan. You new?”
She nods. “Freshman.”
“How you liking it?”
“People are nice enough. Good vibes.”
She’s rubbing her heels back and forth against the chair legs, braiding her fingers nervously. I decide to step things up a gear, studiously ignoring Adam’s and Lewis’s encouraging smiles. She’s really pretty. But I’m struggling to break the ice here, and I suddenly feel just as awkward as she does.What happened to all that confidence you used to have?
After ten minutes of exhausting, ass-clenching conversation, a teammate scoots over to grab me for a game of beer pong.
“Duty calls!” I smile apologetically. “Listen, Cheyenne—this was cool. Let’s check in later?”
She beams at me. “Sure. Enjoy!”
Her cheeks flush to match her dress. She’s shy, I realize. It must have taken a lot for her to come over and join me. But I’m feeling on edge. I need to get some fresh air before this night goes down as one of the worst in living history.The whole point of coming here was to fuckin’ relax!
This definitely isn’t my proudest moment, but I drop her a salute and dash out to the yard, grabbing a shot of something orange on my way. And that’s when all those beers I’ve been pounding finally shut my overthinking brain right up.
THE NEXT DAY, IT FEELSlike something crawled up and died in my skull. I have no idea how I got home, and I have no memory of the whole second half of the night, either. I do remember Carrie’s latest big idea and that false start with Cheyenne, though.
I manage to drag my ass to class and eat lunch alone before hitting the gym hard all afternoon. Anything to shake off the beer fog.
We’ve won all our scrimmages so far, but my dad would kill me ifhe found out I’ve been hitting the bottle when the season hasn’t even really started yet. Treadmill. Weights. Pool. I punish my muscles as hard as I can, draining my mind, pushing my body to exhaustion.
Once I’ve sweated myself dry, I head straight for bed. This would normally be when I head over to Carrie’s, and I would normally always be the one to message first. Not today, though—today, I need space. The whole “get yourself a girlfriend” thing is fucking with my head. What I need right now is a good night’s sleep.
IT’S BEEN TWO DAYS SINCEI last saw Carrie. Two days since I last heard from her, in fact, and I’d never tell her this, but I kind of miss her.
I cut through the park and spot her at the table where she usually hangs for lunch. My heart lurches. My mind has been working overtime since her last message. I can’t stop wondering whether things are going to be different between us now. Guess it’s time to find out.
“Ms. Wolinski!”
She doesn’t look up from her notes. And instead of a “hey,” all she does is arch a brow.Great.
I sit across from her. “Bad day, huh?”
She slams her folder shut and leans her cheek against her fist. When our eyes meet, a hundred different feelings hit me all at once.
