Archie, however, takes hold of my hand and merrily skips along, telling me everything he knows about snakes—most of which he learned from a pack of Top Trumps.
“That’s brill, Archie!” I gush, keen to encourage him. “You’re so clever!”
When we reach the village and arrive at the café, Mabel connects to the Wi-Fi and gets straight on the phone to her mum. I order everyone a soft drink and find a table on the terrace. As soon as Theo and Callum arrive—looking triumphant but sweaty and covered in leaves, thorns and pollen—Mabel thrusts the phone at Theo.
He sighs and slumps onto one of the plastic chairs. “Alright, Kate?”
“Theo, what’s going on?” Kate blasts over the speaker. “Apparently you’ve just been attacked by a snake. And last night Callum got drunk—no doubt on one of Adam’s bottles of booze.”
Something snaps inside me.
“Kate …” Theo begins. But he stops. And he throws his hands in the air, as if in surrender.
“Come on,” Kate pushes, “I want to hear what you’ve got to say.”
“WhatcanI say?” Theo replies. “What difference would it make?”
“Look, I’m worried about my children,” Kate steams on. “As a mother, I’m perfectly entitled to be concerned about their welfare. And I’ve got to be honest, I think Adam’s a negative influence.”
At that point, I stop listening.
All that matters is that Theo is just sitting there, stabbing at the ice in his drink. He doesn’t defend me at all.
“Why didn’t you stand up to her?” I bark, when Theo and I are alone in our room. “You didn’t stand up to her at all!”
Theo flops back on the bed. “Oh, Ads, I just felt so defeated.”
He lets out a shaky sigh and I can tell how much he’s suffering. But I’m so gripped by anger—an anger that’s been building ever since the phone call—that I can’t stop myself.
“Defeated or guilty?” I fire back, pacing around next to the bed. I’m only wearing my underpants but it doesn’t occur to me to hold in my stomach.
Theo turns to face me. “What does that mean?”
I stop and look him in the eye. “Theo, it’s obvious you feel guilty about leaving Kate. Go on, deny it!”
He sits up and smooths down his shirt. “I do feel guilty about lying to her. Although if I hadn’t, we wouldn’t have the kids so I don’t know what to make of that. I don’t think I feel guilty about leaving her. Maybe just some of the details. Maybe the timing.”
I shake my head. “Brill! So your parents have got through to you.”
“No, it’s not that. It’s just … I don’t know, it’s complicated.”
I gasp dramatically. “‘It’s complicated’. Where have I heard that before?” Pretty much every single time a bloke has dumped me, I say to myself.
Theo shuffles towards me on the bed. “Ads, what do you mean?”
I tuck my hands under my armpits. “Look, Theo, this isn’t complicated at all. It’s perfectly simple: if you hadn’t left Kate when you did, you wouldn’t have met me. So do youregretmeeting me? Is that what you’re saying?”
He stands up. “Bloody hell, Ads, that’s not what I’m saying. That’s not what I’m saying at all.”
But I’m so angry I hardly take it in. “Bullshit, Theo! You’re ashamed of me. You’re just not brave enough to say it!”
Theo walks down the little staircase to shut the door so the kids won’t hear. “Ads, I’m sorry about earlier,” he says, calmly. “You’re right, I should have stood up to Kate.”
But I don’t register his apology. And now I’ve pulled the cork on my feelings, I can’t stop them splurging out. “Oh, this is all such a nightmare. This whole trip’s a disaster. Callum and Mabel hate me.”
Theo starts tugging off his clothes. “They don’t hate you, Adam. It’s just hard for them. I expect it is for all kids who have a parent that gets a new partner.”
I roll my eyes dramatically. “It’s not like we had an affair! It’s not like Istoleyou off Kate! And it could never have worked between you two, anyway!”
