‘You have no idea what you’re doing,’ said Rachelle. ‘You’re really going to go, aren’t you?’
‘Yes.’
She let out a sigh and rolled her eyes. ‘Then I had better take you myself.’ She grabbed the sleeve of my cardigan. ‘Come on, quickly. We won’t have much time.’
I couldn’t deny I was grateful for Rachelle’s help. I knew my plan was flawed in that I didn’t know how to get to the camp, even though I had tried to memorise the way so if I came again, I’d be able to find my own way. I didn’t want to get Rachelle into trouble for helping me, but every time I thought of a reason why I shouldn’t be doing this, the pain of Edgar’s death came back, hitting me harder than before, knocking away any rational thoughts. I harnessed the anger. It was the only way to get through this.
It didn’t take us long to get deep into the forest, all the time listening out for any German patrols. When we came up against the camp guards, I was relieved as it meant we were close.
‘Does Gaston know you’re coming?’ asked one of them after he recognised Rachelle.
‘I don’t need an appointment to see my own brother,’ replied Rachelle, with rather more bravery than I suspected she had. ‘It’s important we see him.’
‘It needs two of you?’
‘Just let us through,’ said Rachelle.
After a moment’s consideration, the Frenchman took us through to the camp. ‘Hey, Gaston. Your sister and the other one are here!’ he called out.
Gaston was leaning over a wooden table with a group of other men, studying several maps. The men turned, and I noticed the one next to Gaston was Marcel. He made eye contact but didn’t acknowledge me. Gaston strode over to us.
‘Rachelle? Is everything all right?’ he asked immediately, the concern etched on his face.
‘Yes. Well, no, but it’s personal. Is there somewhere we can talk?’
‘Of course.’ He led us over to the cabin where I had worked on the German uniform. The room was empty. ‘What’s wrong?’ he asked once we were inside.
‘Do you want to tell him?’ asked Rachelle.
I nodded. ‘We had some bad news yesterday. Very bad,’ I said. ‘Edgar has been killed.’
‘What? How?’ Gaston visibly paled at the news.
‘He was arrested. I don’t know the details. My father sent a telegram.’ I took the piece of paper from my pocket and handed it to Gaston, who quickly read it.
He sat down heavily in the chair. ‘Edgar,’ he whispered to himself before running his hand down his face.
I wasn’t sure if I should comfort him or not, but a small shake of the head from Rachelle told me not to. Gaston took a deep, steadying breath and got to his feet. He embraced me in his arms, holding me tight. ‘I am so sorry, Nathalie.’
The one small act of sympathy and kindness nearly sent me over the edge again and I fought to keep the emotion back. I didn’t want to fall to pieces here at the camp, not when I needed Gaston’s help, and showing any kind of weakness would not help my cause.
‘I’m all right,’ I said eventually, pulling back from my cousin. ‘He died a brave and courageous Frenchman who did not bow to the Germans. He was proud of what he was doing. We were very proud of him too.’
‘Of course. And rightly so,’ said Gaston. ‘Edgar was always one to stand up against power and bullies. I remember him getting into a few scrapes with the locals when he came to stay here during the summer. He stuck up for a young lad in the village who was being picked on by some older boys. Edgar didn’t care they were bigger than him. He just saw the injustice in what they were doing.’
The recollection warmed my heart. It was comforting to hear such good words spoken about my brother. ‘He was always like that,’ I said. ‘He had a great sense of right and wrong.’
We all stood without speaking for a moment, lost in our own memories of Edgar. It was Gaston who broke the silence first. ‘I’m sorry, but I need to get back to my meeting. Thank you for coming to tell me in person, even though I would prefer you didn’t take unnecessary risks.’ He gave Rachelle a pointed look.
‘It wasn’t my idea,’ said Rachelle. ‘Nathalie was coming, regardless. I thought it was best if I at least took her the right way so she wouldn’t get lost.’
Gaston nodded as if accepting his sister’s explanation. ‘Alors, be careful going back, then.’
‘Oh, we’re not going back yet,’ said Rachelle.
Gaston frowned and looked between Rachelle and me. ‘You’re not?’
Rachelle raised her eyebrows and nodded in my direction. ‘Nathalie is here for another reason.’
