The princess shakes her head. “Meredy’s. But I wish I’d thought of it days ago.”
I can’t believe this is happening. I’d pinch myself to see if I’m dreaming, but I can’t move my hands. And with each passing moment, what little patience I have is fading.
“Valoria. Take these off right now,” I demand through gritted teeth. “I have no chance of finding your mother if I’m locked up.” When she doesn’t show any sign of relenting, I lower my voice to ahushed calm. “Fine. You win. I’ll never touch a drop of that potion again. But Jax and Simeon need my help tracking down the missing Dead and a very dangerous man who’s already tried to feed at least one person to a Shade.” A man who’s apparently quite good at hiding, if yesterday’s search is any indication.
“Jax and Simeon know what we’re doing here. And we have their support.” Valoria leans closer, frowning down her nose at me. “They don’t want you going back to the Deadlands, or anywhere else, until you have a clear head and aren’t a few potions away from death.”
I try to ball my hands into fists, but of course I can’t. Instead, I give Valoria my widest, most pleading eyes. Of my two captors, she’s the one I’m sure has a heart. The one I know how to wound with words. “Please,Highness. There’s no time for this now!”
“Oh, but there is, Master Necromancer.” Valoria squares her shoulders and stands taller, looking every bit like the leader I know she could be. I just wish she wasn’t directing her fiercest stare at me, forcing me to glower back. “Do you have any idea what this is doing to us—your friends? You’ll be more of a danger than a help to Jax and Simeon if you keep drinking that potion. Grenwyr needs you.” Her gaze and voice soften as she adds, “Ineed you. The real you, not the one who’s been spending half her time in an imaginary world of monsters.”
Meredy’s words are so quiet, I almost miss them. “There are enough real monsters in Karthia to keep you busy, if you’d just look around.”
I exchange a glance with her, wondering if she’s thinking of yesterday’s rogue necromancers. She smiles wanly, and a flickeringimage of Evander hits me like a knife in the gut. I turn my back on her, focusing all my attention on the princess.
“Meredy obviously wants to see me suffer.” The shaking in my hands spreads to my knees, but I’d rather fight to keep standing than sit on the bed besideher. “That much I understand. But, Valoria, why areyoudoing this to me?”
“You brought me out of my tower. You helped me realize I have a voice, however small, that deserves to be heard.” The princess puts her arms around me, hugging my rigid back and filling me with unexpected warmth. “And now I want to lead you out of the darkness.”
“What if the darkness is where I belong?” I fight to keep my voice steady as I think of all the times I walked the palace halls with Evander, when my biggest worry was how to convince him we should move there. “What if I spend every potion-free day wishing I’d died in the Deadlands with him? What if the pain of being alone is too much?”
An image of Master Cymbre’s face as she pulled me from the flames in a faraway field flashes to mind, knotting my stomach with guilt.
“You won’t wish that.” Valoria squeezes my shoulder. “Because you won’t be alone. You’ll have me, and we’ll fight the pain and the darkness together.”
I open my mouth to ask her how I can fight anything with my hands chained, but my knees buckle and I sway. Frowning, Valoria steadies me, then pushes me gently down onto the bed. Resigned to my fate, I sink onto my unmade sheets.
When I wake up some time later, Meredy is gone. For a while, as the sun makes its ascent in a clear blue sky, I watch Valoria as she sits by my feet, scribbling in a leather-bound notebook of yellowed parchment.
“What are you working on?” I manage to ask. Beads of sweat collect on my forehead, but when Valoria pours me a glass of water, I’m too nauseated to drink.
Valoria makes a soft disapproving sound, but she doesn’t force the issue. Instead, she holds up her notebook. “This is my air balloon.” She taps the drawing at the center of the spread pages, a giant loopy thing with strings coming out of the bottom and what looks like a large basket dangling from the strings. “Fire should make the balloon rise, but I’ve got to figure out how to contain the flames so they won’t burn the people sitting in the basket. A flying balloon could be a new way to travel.”
I lick sweat from my lips and surprise myself by laughing. The image of several Dead looking on in awe and fear as Valoria ascends into the sky in a flaming balloon is just too much. “Where do you come up with these things? What is it your Sight shows you that inspires you to want to, well,fly?”
Valoria’s cheeks turn rosy pink. “They’re not all my ideas. I found the air balloon and several other designs for flying machines in a book. There’s a section of the palace library that used to hold books from before Eldest Grandfather’s second reign began, books full of all sorts of ideas people started but never got a chance to finish.” She tries to push her glasses up the bridge of her nose, though they’re already in place. “Hethinks all those books were burned, but I saved as many as I could in my tower. When I read them, Isee ways to improve the designs. There’s just the matter of getting a chance to try...”
I smile, leaning back against my pillows and wondering what Evander would think of a flying balloon. He’d probably volunteer to be Valoria’s first victim—er, passenger. I bet he’d consider it an exciting way to see what lies beyond Karthia’s borders.
Maybe someday, I can sail the skies for him. Even if the thought terrifies me.
“Why don’t we take your air balloon down to the beach one night?” I gasp between shaky breaths. I’m sweating so hard now, my blankets cling to me like a second skin. “Where the Dead won’t see it. Maybe we can get it working.”
Valoria’s expression shifts from one of shock and gratitude to complete horror as I start to convulse.
“Have some water,” Valoria says meekly, dropping her book to dab my sweaty face with a cool, damp cloth.
“Evander,” I gasp as I writhe, unable to keep my traitorous body still. Without the potion, I won’t see my perfect illusion of him anymore. And if I can’t see him, over time, I’ll forget what he looked like. Without the potion, I’ll truly lose him. “I can’t see him,” I sob as Valoria presses the cloth to my forehead. “I can’t—I can’t...”
Moments later, my screams echo off the walls.
XIX
Idon’t know how much time has passed since I last opened my eyes, if it’s been days or just a few hours, but the moon hangs low in my window like a curious spectator, and Valoria is nowhere to be seen.
My throat is dry, my lips rough as old parchment. “I’m thirsty,” I croak to no one in particular.
“Would you like some goat’s milk?” Meredy asks, emerging from the shadows dragging a chair toward my bedside. “I’ve brought sage water as well. If you’d like, I could make coriander water instead. It’s popular in Lorness.”
