Memories ran through my head confirming what he said as true. I remembered once my Dad had toured with Cruel Distraction for a world tour that took almost nine months. He brought home all these dolls for me. They were beautiful and very expensive. The disappointment and embarrassment in his face was evident when our mom had to explain to him that I no longer played with dolls and had thrown out all of my old ones months ago still made my stomach flip with guilt.
Our parents loved us and didn’t want to leave us. We never knew anything other than love from them. But travel was part of their jobs. They were popular musicians before we were born, and they continued their extremely successful careers after. Too often people thought that parenthood meant you had to stop your life to devote everything to your kids. That wasn’t true. You had to figure out a good balance.
“You ever wonder how we would have ended up if she had stayed with Chris? Like, if we would have continued music and stuff?” Dallas asked me. I cocked an eyebrow.
“I don’t like thinking about him, honestly. It only makes me feel bad for Brooklyn. And Mom, sometimes.”
“Fair enough. I just wonder if we were really meant to be musicians, or it was just forced on us.”
“Do you think it was?”
“Sometimes. I mean, think about it. I like doing other things. I used to be big on makeup stuff. I like to think if I didn’t pursue music, I’d have done special effects. For like movies, you know? And you with your books. Tate bought you a bookstore for Christ’s sake. What’s stopping you from quitting music and focusing on running that yourself?”
I frowned, thinking about his words. It didn’t sound terrible, honestly. The idea that I wouldn’t be on stage though, was... unnerving. I forced myself to change the subject.
“What is going on with you today? I didn’t know you had deep thoughts,” I teased. He smirked.
“On occasion. You want a beer?” he asked, reading my mind. He knew I wanted to move on. I nodded and he disappeared into the dancing crowd to get one.
Finally, we were up and for an hour I could pretend I had no problems and focus on entertaining the people who paid to see us. I sang my heart out, as if I was singing for a stadium of people, rather than a few hundred. Everyone else seemed to have the same energy. We were all on point. Overall, it was a fantastic set.
We went back to the hotel with full wallets, new connections, and promises to spread the word about us. We were all in good moods finally, even Tate. He had loosened up quite a bit after he got a video call from his mom before and after the show. Cara had been sleeping both times, but it still eased his worries to see that she was okay.
Early in the morning we were on the road. I had wanted to sleep in, but we were all afraid of Tate losing his mind if we waited for the afternoon to leave.
We stopped at a gas station to fill up the van and our stomachs. I was in the store, looking at the donuts. I hated jelly ones, but it was hard to tell which ones were which. Tate’s phone rang and he gave me a quick smile before leaving to take the call outside. I didn’t think anything of it and continued my search for a long John with Bavarian cream.
I had just bagged up three of them and was folding the bag closed when I heard shouting from outside. I dropped my bag on the counter beside the donut shelves and ran outside. My stomach lurched and my heart sank as I discovered I was too late. I watched on in horror as Tate swung his fist so hard at Ronny’s jaw blood spurted all over the van doors and the pavement.
Ronny fell to the ground holding his face. Blood was coming quick and thick through his hands. Tate leaned down and reached into Ronny’s pockets. He fished until he found the keys and then stormed over to the van without a second glance behind him.Was he leaving us here?
I couldn’t move as I looked on. Tate opened the driver’s side door and started the van up. I could hear him shifting it from park to drive and then he pressed his foot on the gas as hard as he could. The van shot forward, out of the parking lot in an instant. What the hell just happened?
I blinked, my mind and body unfreezing. I ran to Ronny and helped him up. He was glaring at me.His cheek had been busted open and was leaking blood all over.
“Your husband is a fucking psycho. I’m reporting my van as stolen.”
“Where’s the van?” Cash came from the bathroom.
“Don’t worry, he’s already walking back,” Dallas smirked, pointing ahead of us towards where Tate had taken off. We moved off to the side so other people could pump gas and waited. Sure enough, we saw Tate walking back to us, shoulders slumped in defeat.
He waited until he reached us to collapse.
“Did you crash my van?” Ronny demanded through the blood. He had removed his shirt and pressed it to his face. Tate ignored him, walking right past him. He crumpled to the curb, putting his hands on his knees. I hurried over to him, sitting beside him. I looked over to my bandmates and shook my head. I waved them off, they shrugged and went back into the gas station.
“Tate, what did you do?” I asked. He shook his head.
“Nothing. That’s the problem. Cara was taken to the hospital. I don’t know any other details because my mom’s phone died. I was trying to leave but Ronny wanted to find a restaurant to eat first. I took the fucking van and it overheated. Jesus Christ, I can’t catch a break,” he groaned.
“Cara’s in the hospital?” I asked, my voice on edge. I realized that two of us panicking wasn’t a good thing so I attempted to relax myself, but I could tell it wasn’t working.
“Yep. All I know is the hospital name. I feel like I’m fucking drowning. The band, my day job, Cara. I’m barely scraping by, I can’t drop any of them, and now I’m going to need a full-time nanny if I want any of this to work? How am I supposed to afford that?”
“I can help,” I said cautiously. My money situation was always a little awkward. I didn’t want for anything. I’d never needed a real job. “I can pay for a nanny.”
“Oh, thanks. That’s great. You want to buy me something pretty too?” His head shot up angrily.
“What? No, Tate, it’s not like that.”
