My hands went to my temples, and I closed my eyes as I began to pace.
“Ronny, this whole this is so wrong. I shouldn’t have- I didn’t know what to do. The doctor told me not to tell you.”
“Tell me what? Will you stop moving and come back here?”
I paused and looked at him. He was glaring steel daggers at me. I pressed my lips together and shook my head again. This was it. No more.
“Ronny, you and I broke up. Before the accident. The day before.”
Silence swallowed all the air in the room. I sighed, my body relaxing. All the tension I’d been holding in these last four weeks finally released.
Ronny’s face went through a multitude of emotions all in a few minutes. Shock, confusion, hurt, realization, and then finally, they settled on anger.
“Are you fucking kidding me?”
I shook my head.
“No. We did. It wasn’t great. But I can’t keep doing this. I care about you, but not in the way you want me to.” I crossed my arms over my chest self-consciously. It was an awkward conversation no matter how many times you had it.
“It’s because of him, isn’t it? And that stupid kid. He convinced you that it’s all going to be perfect with him. That you’ll be a cute little family. Didn’t he?” When I didn’t answer right away, he repeated the last question louder. “Didn’t he?”
I flinched, despite him being wheelchair bound and being half across the room. Ronny knew better than anyone the power of words. He could hurt me with his tongue more than his fists ever could. I had to look away from his stone cold eyes. Which only confirmed his suspicions.
“I fucking knew it. I fucking knew he’d convince you to go playMommyfor that bastard baby of his.”
I cringed.
“Stop. It’s not what you think,” I protested but even I could hear the bullshit in my own voice. He scoffed.
“Okay, then what is it? Are you staying married to him?”
“Yes.” My voice came out soft, but I tried to be as firm as possible.
“And you two are going to raise that baby, with you as it’s mother?”
“Why are you doing this? See, this is exactly why I couldn’t be with you anymore. You are the biggest dick I’ve ever met.”
He reached down and reversed himself, wheeling himself towards me.
“Do I not have the right to be angry? I just spent the last month, most of it bedridden mind you, thinking that you cared about me. All the while you’re off fucking some douche who convinced you to do something we all know you aren’t meant for.”
“How do you know that? You never once asked me if what I wanted for my future. Maybe marriage and a family is what I want!”
He laughed. It came out cold and unfeeling. He moved over to me, now barely three feet apart. I didn’t bother moving away.
“Because I know you. Music is your life. We just got started again. What are you going to do with a baby? Take it on a bus? No one is going to be cool with that.”
I didn’t answer him. I hadn’t really thought about that. What were we supposed to do when we wanted to travel for shows? He had a point. Ronny saw the hesitance in my face and grinned.
“See, I told you. He convinced you to take this on when you really don’t want to. But that’s fine. You want him; you can have him. I’m not going to keep trying to make you forget about him, and I’m not going to be here when he knocks up some other bitch.”
He reached his hand back down and rolled the wheels forward. I didn’t move, letting him move past me towards his room down the hall.
The click of the door opening just then made him stop and both of our heads turn. The attention shifted. I didn’t care who was coming through that door, I was grateful none the less. My stomach lurched again though, as I saw that it was Tate. Jesus Christ, why? What had I done in a past life to deserve this?
“Hey! I heard you were up and about. Thought I’d come see how you were and maybe jam a little.”
“Perfect. Come get your stupid fucking wife,” Ronny murmured as he continued to his room. Silence was harsh in the apartment until he slammed his bedroom door and music began playing loudly from behind it.
