Lucy’s throat turned tight as she gazed upon the child. He was not hers. He had nothing to do with her. And yet…that will change, and I am excited to see it happen.
She had not wanted this life. She had not yearned for it, expected it, asked for it. Motherhood was not something Lucy ever aspired to, as freedom was her calling. But she watched James sleep, she pictured the future, knowing that she would forever be a part of it, and that made her heart swell in ways she could never have expected.
Maybe this new life wouldn’t be so bad after all…
* * *
Marcus had been walking past the nursery when he heard the voices. One belonged to Helga, the nurse, while the other was undoubtedly Lucy.
He was pleased to hear that she had visited James already. And of her own accord. While she and he had a conversation concerning such things, and while they had agreed to try their best from here on out, he had worried too that she might still resist that which he had married her for.
Marcus did not expect Lucy to take to motherhood right away. All he wanted was for her to try. He promised her freedom, and in return, this was what he needed.
That she is doing it too, without me having to press her… maybe this marriage stands a chance. Who would have guessed such a thing?
He crept toward the open nursery door so that he could better hear what was being said, and he smiled when he heard Lucy’s laughter.
“I’m doing it,” she said, delight heard clearly in her voice.
“You certainly are,” Helga responded.
Careful not to be seen, Marcus peered around the doorway, and a smile reached his lips as he saw Lucy cradle baby James in her arms in a way that almost looked natural. And even if it was not, the smile she wore certainly was.
He watched her for a moment longer than he meant to.
Marcus had never wanted to be a father, nor had he wanted to be a husband. This marriage was not about falling in love, merely a business contract, done for the sake of his deceased friend and his child. But as he stood there, observing his wife and their son…
It is hard to say what I feel. Satisfaction? Relief? Those words, although apt, fall painfully short…
He felt a sudden desire to walk into the room and be with the two of them. It felt as if he should do. Marcus smothered thaturge and then felt immediate guilt because of it. Not that he understood why. He was doing the right thing, more than what was expected, and that should have been enough. Yet, it did not feel that way.
This marriage was still in its infancy, and he wondered where it might go. In some ways, he was curious to find out, while in others he was terrified.
It had all become so real so quickly. His Grace, the Duke of Calderwick suddenly a father, now a husband… what next? And most importantly, what did he want to come next? That, he had no answer for.
