I blinked and nodded slowly.
“Always?” he asked, peering into my eyes, and I couldn’t help but nod again.
His face stiffened.“That bastard had one job, and he couldn’t do that,” he cursed, hissing under his breath, and I couldn’t help but smile at his words.“You know I’m glad he’s dead; otherwise, I might’ve sliced him into the same number of pieces he slept with you,” he said, smiling at me.
“That’d be ninety-two,” I said softly, pursing my lips.
He sat up quickly and turned to face me. A few moments of silence followed.
“In how many days?” his gaze darkened.
I gulped nervously, answering.“In three months,”
“Motherfucker!” he cursed, looking away from me. His hands were tightly clenched, and I opened my fingers to let him withdraw his hand, but he looked back into my eyes and pulled my hand.
“Hey, I’m not leaving you.” I chuckled, and a tear slipped down my cheek. He moved closer to me and gazed into my eyes.“Did he ever please you?” he added.
I swallowed to moisten my dried throat.
“I’m not sure what you’re asking,” I said, gazing softly into his eyes. His face drew nearer, and I blinked, feeling my breath grow heavy.
“Like kissing you?” he asked, and I shuddered.“Anywhere?” he asked slowly while I shook my head.“Never went down on you?” he asked, and I frowned.“Like kissing you down there?” I felt shy at the sound of him and lowered my gaze, shaking my head.
“And have you ever had a… release?” he asked slowly, as I lifted my gaze to meet his eyes. I didn’t understand why his words stirred something in my lower belly.
I shook my head slowly as he blinked silently, frowning.“You know, summoning someone’s soul after death is possible. I mean, we can summon that bastard’s soul into a bottle and bury it underground so he never rests in peace—”
“Stop!” I cut him off, shaking my head.“I don’t want to do that or anything related to him,” I clarified, and his gaze softened as he looked at me.
After a brief pause, he gently kissed my forehead.
“I’m here for you,” he drawled.
I froze and stuttered, replying,“I know,” before inhaling deeply and murmuring,“So?” He narrowed his brows.“How does that dagger work?” I hesitated, unable to set my curiosity aside, and he chuckled softly before responding.
He mumbled,“Um…” rolling his tongue over his lips,“so it goes in. Like the time you are comfortable using your hand. I mean, for thrusting,”
I sucked my lip, feeling hot.
“So, you did that to… women? Is that what you meant by… killing women?” I asked slowly, earning a slight nod from him.
Biting my lower lip, I spoke,“I mean, why would someone…” I was uncertain of what to say.“It is terrifying.”
But he shook his head, chuckling softly.“You don’t understand women,” stepping closer and gazing deeply into my eyes.“When a woman tastes sin and craves it, she can either rise like a phoenix or become a slave to her desires.” His voice was deep as he spoke words of enlightenment.
“Are you saying that once a woman knows satisfaction, she can’t avoid it?” He nodded.“But a woman working in a brothel experiences that, right? Why isn’t she satisfied and asking you to spend a night with her?” I asked.
He bit his lip slightly.“You’ve experienced it too. Are you satisfied?” he asked, leaving me stunned.
I shook my head.
“Sadly, the world of man is too occupied satisfying themselves to understand what a woman wants,” he sighed, and I couldn’t agree more with him. My husband never understood that the problem was with him, not me.
“I always hated what my Maasi-maa did and how she lived. Growing up, I idolised her as my mother, but when I learned about her past, my feelings shifted to hatred. However, after her death, I realised she was a woman with desires that exceeded those of a man, whether physical, emotional, or financial. A man would come, show her some love, and then leave her to fend for herself. She had no choice but to move on. But in the process, she lost her virtue; her image faded, and she became a slave to her needs, which ultimately ruined her.” He paused as I cushioned his hand.
“Do you think I’m becoming a slave to my needs, like how I keep coming to you?” I asked curiously.
He shook his head.“No. You rose like a phoenix; you’re stronger than you think,” he replied, and I gulped nervously as I glanced at his dagger.
