Either way, it had been a reality check, both for my present and my future. I was helpless, trapped in this life with no way out that didn’t put both myself and the people I cared about in danger.
I couldn’t take it anymore. Spinning away from the mirror, I turned to the windows, scanning the street outside for my friends.
My breath caught in my throat.
Jay.
He was standing on the other side of the street, staring at me with wide, dark eyes. The devastation written all over his face shattered me, breaking my heart into pieces as the realisation hit me.
No one affected me like him. No one made me feel the way he did. No one would even come close to my heart. Because it was his. Somehow, he’d gone from the boy I hated to the man I was falling for, and there was no way for us to be together.
I took a step forwards, lifting my palm to the glass. Alorry rumbled past, cutting off our connection, and when it moved on, Jay was gone.
My gaze remained fixed on the spot where he’d been standing until my vision blurred, and it was only then that I realised I was crying.
“Nova? What’s the matter?”
“Babe, talk to us.”
“Jay. He—he was outside, and he saw me, and I… The look on his face. I-I—” I gasped out between sobs. “He’s the only man I’ve ever had feelings for, and he c-can’t be mine.”
“Oh, babe.” Liana slid her arm around my waist. “Let’s go somewhere private, and we can talk, okay?”
“The changing rooms over there,” Vesper murmured, coming up on my other side. “Quick.”
Inside one of the private rooms, Liana locked the door before placing my coffee down on the counter next to a box of tissues. She pulled out a tissue and carefully dabbed at my eyes, wiping my tears away until I’d composed myself. “Do you want to talk about what happened?”
“I wasn’t expecting to see him, and he obviously wasn’t expecting to see me, either. He looked so shocked and so heartbroken. It just hit me, just how strong my feelings for him were. Are. And obviously, I knew he liked me, but that look on his face…there was no way that could be faked. If there’s any chance he feels the same way about me as I do about him, then this has to be hurting him so badly. Would you want to see the person you wanted to be with trying on wedding outfits, knowing that they were getting married to someone else? It was unbearable for me, and I can’t stand the thought of him feeling that way.”
Vesper clasped my hands between hers, her gaze fixed on mine. “Nova. Listen to me. Life’s too short. Take every bitof happiness you can because our world will chew you up and spit you out without a second thought.”
“She’s right,” Liana said. “Take your happiness where you can. They may be forcing you into this marriage, but you’re in control. You are your own person, andno oneowns you.”
They were right. I pulled them into a hug, so grateful to have them both in my corner. “I love you both. Thank you.”
I was stuck in one situation, but it didn’t mean I had to take it lying down. If I was careful, maybe I could give both myself and Jay a piece of happiness. Something that I wanted him to have, that no one else could take from me.
“We shouldn’t be meeting?—”
“Come inside. Quick.” Grabbing Jay’s hand, I dragged him into the barrow.
There was a moment where our eyes met and time seemed to stand still. Then we launched ourselves at each other, his mouth coming down on mine as he swept me into his arms.
When we broke apart, he stroked his fingers through my hair, the corners of his lips tilting up as he gazed down at me. It gave me butterflies.
“We shouldn’t be meeting,” he repeated, although there was no conviction in his words this time. Even so, I wanted to reassure him. When I’d texted him to say we needed to meet, he’d initially been reluctant, and I hadn’t even been certain he would come. After I’d done my best to communicate that I needed to talk to him and clear the air, he’d finally agreed. But we were both well aware of the risks of meeting alone, and so I’d prepared carefully for tonight.
“Don’t worry. I made sure it was safe. I promise. Liana has my phone, and she’s covering for me all night in case anyone comes looking.”
Now we were here together. No one else knew about this place, and it was just the two of us, undisturbed, for as long as he wanted to stay.
Jay stared around the barrow, taking in the flickering candles and tiny, glowing fairy lights, the music playing softly from my speaker, and the piles of blankets and pillows covering the floor. “This is cosy,” he drawled. I shivered, and his mouth curved into a smirk. “Wanna tell me why we’re here? I’m not complaining about that kiss, but you said you wanted to talk.”
“I did. I do. Can you sit down?”
He lowered himself to the pile of blankets, stretching out his legs in front of him. Once again, he looked completely at home in my private space. He raised a brow, looking pointedly from me to the space next to him, and I sank down beside him, close enough that we’d be touching if either of us leaned in, although I made sure to stay upright.
“Okay,” I began. “Earlier… I think it was, um, unexpected for both of us.”
