The day of Hans’ funeral was one of those tricky fall days where the sun was shining in a crisp blue sky, but as soon as you stepped outside, the frigid air went straight to your bones.
“Damn, Ali’s looking swell,” Kappy said, his breath hanging in the cold air as he craned his neck to see the crowd of people behind us. “Wasn’t she always…” he cocked his head to the side, “teeny?”
“What do you mean?” That felt like a strange thing to comment. I immediately searched the sea of black mourners for Ali. Hockey players and figure skaters of all ages, some with families, some alone, were walking up the cemetery’s gravel path to Hans’ grave. Between Hans’ time back in Michigan at Centre Ice and here at the Coliseum in Chicago, there were probably dozens of Olympians and NHL hockey players in the crowd coming to pay their respects. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find the one figure skater I’d been searching for all morning.
“Like, she was a little younger than us, sure, but she was always kind of…” His face scrunched in thought. “How do I say this?” He licked his lips. “Notcurvy? I think she got a boob job.” Kappy smirked.
I whipped my neck to him. “What?”
“Yeah, I wanna ask, but that’s weird, right? Let’s have one of thegirls ask her.”
“No. Mind your own business,” I snapped, annoyed that he was talking about her when I couldn’t even see her. I shifted uncomfortably in my small seat. “And don't look at her boobs. You have a girlfriend—who would kill you.”
“Wife,” he corrected, wagging his eyebrows.
I shoved him, almost knocking him off his seat.
“Ow.” He laughed. “Don’t let Piper see you hit me, she’ll kill you. Besides, I didn’t say anything mean, she looks good. I’m just curious.”
“Yeah, well, don’t be,” I huffed.
“Touchy, jeez,” he said, giving me a curious look as he straightened his tie.
Piper scurried over to the empty seat Kappy saved for her and motioned for us to lean in. Not in a million years did I expect her to blurt out: “Did you guys see Ali’s boobs? I’m so jealous!” She craned her neck to see her again. “You think she got it done while traveling? I gotta ask for her surgeon, damn.” Piper touched the top of her dress and snuck a peek down at herself. “You guys think I should get a boob job?”
Kappy wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into his lap. “No, you’re perfect, baby,” he said, pressing a kiss to her neck, making her giggle and swat at his chest.
“You two are ridiculous,” I muttered, but now I was itching to see what they were talking about. “I just saw Ali and she looked the same.”
Piper’s eyes shifted to mine. “When didyousee her?”
Shit.
I flexed my jaw. I really didn’t want to get into the whole story, especially not today. “Never mind.”
When everyone was seated, the priest started speaking over the grave. My eyes bounced from the photo of Hans, to the casket, to the hole in the ground, and I couldn’t take it. I couldn’t take it that he wouldn’t be in the rink anymore, waiting for us with the words we deeply needed to hear. For some, Hans was just a calm fixture in the rink. For others, Hans was a mentor and friend. For the six of us, Hans was family.
When the priest started speaking about how Hans was joining his wife, Katia, up in heaven, my eyes burned. I had to pull out my sunglasses to shield my eyes. Looking to my side, I noticed Kappyand Colt doing the same thing.
When I straightened back up, that’s when I finally spotted Ali.
As my eyes drifted over her, I noticed subtle differences from this summer. Where she was usually all angles, she looked softer. Maybe she’d just gained some weight. Either way, she looked great. She looked healthy. She wore a simple black peacoat overtop of a dress, and she had her short blonde hair looking freshly cut just below her chin and pushed back behind a thick black headband. She looked less tan than the last time I saw her, and she had big bags under her eyes, but all of us probably had those today.
“You’re staring,” Mer whispered beside me.
“I know.” I sighed as Ali wiped a silent tear away. I wanted so badly to pull her into my arms and be the comfort she needed today.
“At least you don’t deny it anymore. That’s progress,” Mer said thoughtfully.
My eyes were pulled down to Mer’s hopeful blue ones. She was busy bouncing Callahan, who was starting to look too heavy for her. Colt couldn’t help her because he was busy comforting Lucy, who was breaking all of our hearts with her tears for Hans.
“Want me to hold the big guy?” I asked, reaching out for him.
With a smile of thanks, she carefully transferred the drooly guy onto my chest. As soon as he settled, my eyes drifted right back to Ali.
“She’s beautiful,” I said with a sigh.
“Yeah, she is.” Mer gave me an encouraging smile. “You should talk to her. She’s staying with us tonight.”
