Suspicion snaked down my spine.
I found it nice that he came here. I did miss him, and it was nice to see a familiar face. This was JP—one of my best friends. But…
He was still a man.
He tracked me down and sought me out when no one should’ve known my location besides Mer and Piper.
Anxiety filled my chest as dangerous hypotheticals swirled through my mind. Because what if he expected something from me? And hewasdifferent. What if the last decade of life changed him? What if he wasn’tgoodanymore?
My body suddenly felt cold and shaky despite the hot, humid night. I tightened my grip around my knees as my eyes darted to the employees still on the deck, trying to locate familiar faces.
How could I be so stupid? Why didn’t I ask more questions? Why didn’t I bring Val with me to meet him? Why didn’t I—
“Ali, look at me,” JP said in such a gentle voice that it hurt my heart, but I couldn’t make myself. I continued staring straight ahead as panic swamped my senses. “C’mon, you can do it,” he whispered.
With a pained grimace, I dared to glance at him. Surprisingly, there was no judgment there. No pity. His face was completely open and earnest.
“You know me, Al.” He held his large hands up in innocence. “I’d throw myself overboard before I did anything to hurt you. And if you don’t want me here, if you’re not comfortable with me here, tell me to leave and I’ll get off at the next stop and fly home, no questions asked. You have my word, okay? I promise. The truth is…” His nose flared with a breath as he closed his eyes. “I’m here because I was blackout drunk and missing you.”
My heart still pounded, but my mind seemed to calm down a little at his words.
His mouth did a funny dance, like he was trying to stifle a grin. “Kappy started running his mouth about me and you, and then you texted Piper, and I saw it.” He grimaced. “I’m sorry about that. I know it was wrong to look, but I just…” He shook his head. “It was a group picture by a castle and a little message asking Piper to come visit you. And I guess I just…I booked myself a cruise,” he said incredulously. “I don’t even remember that part, I swear.”
A wet laugh popped out of me. With a shaky hand, I moved to wipe my teary eyes. I hated that panic instantly triggered my eyes to water.
“A nonrefundable one, too,” he said with a sheepish laugh. “But I didn’t tell the others I was coming to see you just in case you wanted to send me packing, so there’s no pressure, ya know?”
Sucking in a deep breath, I assessed the man sitting in front of me. His leg was bobbing. His eyes were downcast. His muscular shoulders were tense. JP was nervous. He was nervous to admit all of that to me. And something about that little fact eased my brain. Right then, he reminded me of his caring teenage self, and I knew he was telling the truth. He really would leave if I wanted him to, I was sure of it.
Yes, the years had changed him. It was obvious in his build, and in the way his face had garnered a few more scars—one under his eyebrow, another on the right side of his chin—from hockey, no doubt. Looking at him now, a sudden sadness squeezed my heart. I missed knowing him the way I used to.
“So,” I swallowed hard, “your blacked-out brain booked a cruise,” I mused. “Better hide your phone if you drink any more tonight. What’s next? A car? A plane? Real estate?” I joked, trying to settle both of us.
He weighed my question and let out a small laugh. “No, none of that, but I think I almost bought a puppy.”
“A puppy,” I repeated with a small grin. “I’m shocked you don’t already have one.”
He laughed. “Yeah, me too.” He sat in thought for a second, looking stumped. “Whydon’tI have one?”
I smirked. “Hockey keeping you too busy? You should get a small dog that can fly on the team plane with you.”
He looked aghast. “A small dog?” He shook his head. “C’mon now, Al.”
I bit my lip to tamper down a grin. “That’d be so cute. I could see it now,” I sighed.
“Nope, stop seeing it,” he ordered, struggling to maintain a straight face. “What wouldIdo with a little rat of a dog?”
“Umm, love it? Duh.” I laughed.
“Nah.” He took a sip of beer to cover his grin.
“See, I’d believe you if you could stop grinning,” I teased.
He shook his head, a grin still in place on his handsome face. “Can’t stop.”
“Why? Because deep down you actuallywanta small dog but you’re afraid to admit it?” I wagged my eyebrows at him.
“No, I'm just…” His eyes crinkled at the corners as his shoulders fell into a relaxed slouch. “I’m really happy to be here with you, Al.”
