“Yes.They’re looking for her hat.Thanks for this.It cheered her up after the disappointment of not seeing Graham this weekend.”
“She told me she’d never been crabbing, so I thought she might like to come.”
“I wish I had more time to plan these things,” said Sarah.“It seems I’m always working and delegating the fun to others.”
“Delegating the fun?”
“She has fun with my mom, at the summer camps, with Graham when she visits.But with me?I’m the one who’s always working, keeping things in line.”
“Well, today you are part of the fun crew.”His eyes held compassion, not pity, and she could tell he understood what she was going through.He was a kindred spirit.
She swallowed hard, realizing that this was the first time she’d talked to someone who really heard her, and understood the challenges of raising a child alone.Someone who had also shared their dreams with someone, only to see those dreams dashed.
“I should go and see what’s keeping them,” she said, turning away from his all-seeing gaze.“I’ll be back in a few minutes.”
When she opened the door, she found Riley and Sally rooting through the cupboard in the hall, the contents of which were now scattered on the floor.
“Riley, what on earth are you doing?”
Her daughter froze just as she was climbing up on a step stool to reach the top shelf.“I can’t find it.Simon says we need to bring a hat, and I can’t find it,” Riley yelled, her expression full of frustration.
Sally turned toward her, eyes wide, looking as though she wanted to bolt.
“I see you’re frustrated,” said Sarah, keeping her voice calm, “and you don’t want to disappoint Simon.”
“What if he says I can’t go?”
“Step down from the stool and let me look for it.It might be on the very top shelf.”
As she said this, she remembered exactly where that hat was.It was where she had chucked it when Graham decided he wasn’t returning to their marriage after the separation.When he had, instead, run to the arms of a younger woman.
A woman Graham was now very concerned about because she had been forced to take bed rest.He was there with her today.Sitting in the hospital.He never would have spent his weekend in hospital with Sarah.She would have been left alone to deal with things because, as he told her when he left, “you never really needed me.”
Riley stepped down from the footstool, and Sarah climbed up to search the top shelf.There in the far corner lay the cap, next to another one she’d forgotten about.The Toronto Blue Jays.
“Here.”She pulled them both out of the far corner and shook them out.
“Which one would you like?”she asked, showing them both to Riley.
“The Blue Jays,” said Riley, taking the baseball cap from her.“Simon likes the Blue Jays.”
“I’ll wear the Canucks one,” said Sarah, placing the hat on her head and pulling her ponytail through the back.“Now, how about you two hand me those things?”She pointed to the clothes scattered on the ground.“We’ll tidy up in no time.”
“Oh, Mom, can’t it wait?”
“Riley, I think we need to do it now,” said Sally, picking up a coat from the ground and handing it to Sarah.
“Thank you,” said Sarah, stepping down from the stool and hanging up the coat.Riley shrugged and picked up another.Within minutes the job was done.
“Let’s go,” said Riley, opening the door.
When they went out again, they found Simon chatting to their neighbor, an older woman who had a garden and small orchard Sarah envied.It seemed they were talking about the finer points of growing peaches.
“I’ll tell Sarah when they’re ripe,” said Mrs.Field.“You can come and pick some before the gleaners come.”
“The gleaners?”
“It’s what I call the food co-op group,” chuckled Mrs.Field.“They come and pick my fruit, help me with my pruning, and in turn I give them most of my crop for the food bank and food kitchen.”
