“So Easton, how is football going?” Taylor’s dad, Roger, asks.
“It’s going well,” I tell him. “Our team is having a great year.”
“That's wonderful.” Lauren, Taylor’s mom, smiles. “Travis has said you boys are kicking butt.” She laughs.
“We definitely are.” I chuckle.
“Is the NFL still the plan for you?” Roger asks.
“Yup.” I nod. “I’m working hard to make sure it happens.”
“Good.” He nods. “If you and Taylor are going to build a life together, she deserves a husband who can support her.”
“Dad.” Taylor puts her fork down.
“Now, now, honey. I don’t mean to scold your boyfriend. I mean well, and I want nothing but the best for you. That means a good husband who is financially stable. You need someone who can support you and your children.”
I choke on the mouthful of turkey I just bit into, doesn’t help that it’s dry as hell.
“Children?” I rasp. “We’re only twenty-one. There’s still lots of time for that.”
“Also, we don’t even know if we want kids,” Taylor says.
“Nonsense.” Her mother waves her off. “Of course you want kids! They’re a blessing. The best thing that could happen to you. But not before you get married, of course.” She looks at me. “You two have been together for nearly six years now. Have you thought about when you will settle down? With you graduating and beginning your careers, the sooner the better.”
“Mom,” Taylor hisses. “Stop. Can’t we just enjoy life while we’re young?”
“You’re not going to be young forever. Plus, having children while your body is in its best shape is important.”
Don’t get me wrong, I like Taylor’s parents; they’re decent people. They’re just too set in their ways and their old-school beliefs. And those beliefs just so happen to clash with who their daughter is.
I don’t care what they think about me, but I don’t want Taylor to deal with her parents looking down on her or being disappointed in her. Not that they have anything to be disappointed about. Taylor is an amazing person. Kind, loving, smart, and the best friend anyone could ask for.
It makes me sad that she has to hide who she is. She’s faced with a dilemma that is hard to manage. Either she holds herself back to keep her parents in her life, or she loses them so she can live as her true self.
Parents are supposed to love and support their children no matter what. Within reason, of course. I mean, if you're genuinely a horrible person, I wouldn’t expect it. Still, even then, it happens.
Taylor and I, unfortunately, weren’t lucky enough to land that lot in life.
There will be no traditional marriage for Taylor and me. No kids. Nothing like that.
I look over at Taylor, and she gives me the same uncomfortable look I’m feeling right now.
We can’t keep living like this, lying to the world. It’s only going to cause more bad than good, more pain than anything else. It worked at the moment it needed to, but now we’re dangerously close to the real world.
We’re going to need to have a talk to decide how long we can keep going on like this.
The rest of the dinner conversation is focused on football. I’d rather that than talk of marriage and babies.
Don’t get me wrong, I want both of those. But not with Taylor. Not with any woman.
Bennett flashes into my mind, and I quickly shut that down.
I did it again. I gave in to my urges, into that intense connection the two of us can’t shake.
We either want to fight or fuck, and there’s been no in between with us.
With every passing day, I grow weary of lying to myself.
