Finch replied with a contemplative hum, and Arthur ignored the speculative look the gentleman settled on him.
“You’re going to leaveher?” The question was stated with all the delicate care of one wishing to insinuate whilst having very little faith that his meaning would be understood.
Giving a mirthless chuckle, Arthur shook his head. “You and your wife are a pair of busybodies, determined to muck about in others’ courtships.”
Finch straightened. “Are you two courting?”
Arthur sank lower into his seat. “I just overheard your wife asking Miss Templeton the same thing. It seems that to help herfamily, she is taking a position as a governess, which will take her far from Oakham.”
“I can think of another position she could take that would serve the same purpose,” said Finch with another of his subtle tones. But to ensure Arthur comprehended the meaning, he added, “A physician could use a wife who knows about medicine.”
“No doubt a physician would welcome such a perfectly suited wife, but not when the lady is opposed to marriage.” Though he tried to hide it, his words were steeped in the disappointment weighing down his heart. Arthur had hoped speaking might provide some solace, but voicing it only allowed that hopelessness to spread throughout him.
“She said that?” asked Finch.
“We were speaking the other day, and she was very adamant about not requiring romance or marriage. She was emphatic about it,” said Arthur with a frown. “And just now she seemed especially appalled at your wife’s speculations about the pair of us.”
“Is it any wonder after all the troubles you’ve had because of people gossiping about your romantic life?”
Arthur paused and considered that. “I didn’t hear the whole of their conversation, though she might’ve mentioned something of that nature. But it doesn’t negate the fact that I asked her if she ever wished to marry, and she dismissed the idea.”
Finch gave another ponderous sound, his eyes roving the group as he considered the situation, though Arthur didn’t know what there was to consider. The course was laid before him, and whether or not he wished it differently, he would soldier on. Miss Templeton had taught him to be more comfortable around ladies, which meant he might be able to talk to one in the future.
A snide laugh echoed in his thoughts: nothing had truly changed. Miss Templeton was an anomaly, and he was no better at speaking with the fairer sex than before.
“Have you spoken with her about your feelings?” asked Finch.
Even now, heat flowed through him, making it difficult to speak—even to a friend whom he trusted not to reveal this conversation to anyone else. But Finch didn’t seem to require an answer.
“You ought to.” Finch gave him an apologetic smile and added, “Heaven knows I am not a prime example of laying myself bare to my sweetheart, but when it comes to love, I fear it’s the only way to win the day. You cannot hope to secure a lady’s heart if you hide yours.”
“What good would it do if she’s made up her mind about matrimony?” Arthur couldn’t help the bleakness in his tone.
Shifting in his seat, Finch leaned closer to Arthur, his eyes full of empathy. “You knew me before my marriage. Did I seem the slightest bit interested in settling down?”
“Not at all,” said Arthur, rubbing at his forehead. “You think finding the right person might change Miss Templeton’s mind as it did yours?”
“There was no mind to change.” With a sigh, Finch settled back into his seat as his forehead creased. “Though it’s not fashionable for young men to claim, I wanted to marry and have a family. However, I didn’t think it possible since I was living off a pittance with no hope of providing for them. The only way for me to bear the sadness of that unfulfilled dream was to banish it from my thoughts. To feign indifference. To fixate on it would’ve only made my life a misery.”
Now it was Arthur’s turn to hum as he considered that.
“When I met Felicity, I didn’t think we could be together because I had nothing to offer her. Even after I discovered she was an heiress, I didn’t think myself worthy of her.” Finch’s eyes fell to the ground, and in a quiet voice that Arthur didn’t think he was intended to hear, the gentleman added, “I still am not certain I am.”
Drawing in a deep breath, Finch turned his gaze back to his friend and added, “People often say things they don’t trulymean to hide their vulnerabilities. And you won’t know the full truth until you speak to her. It isn’t easy, but even if she were to reject you, would you feel any worse than you do now?”
Those words settled in Arthur’s mind as he considered that. While there was a vast difference between suspecting a thing and hearing it outright, was there any true risk involved in speaking to her? He already felt wretched, but if there was a possibility that her opinions were based on a misunderstanding, then all hope may not be lost.
“Do not decide for her, Arthur.”
With that final advice, Finch rose to his feet and joined the rest of his family. All that had happened and all that may happen settled into Arthur’s thoughts as he considered the advice. He’d be a fool to allow Miss Templeton to slip through his fingers. Yet wouldn’t he be a fool to approach a lady who had already stated that she wasn’t interested in marriage or him?
Those questions swirled about his mind, churning up the possibilities of what may occur with either decision, and Arthur didn’t know how long he sat there before Miss Templeton hurried into the room.
“I think it is time,” she said before spinning around and going back to the lying-in chamber with Arthur and Finch fast on her heels.
Chapter 38
Wiping her hands on a rag, Violet stood just beyond Felicity’s birthing cot. Mr. Finch was seated beside his wife, his gaze roving over his son’s face with an expression of utter awe as he held the babe’s hand in his. Now cleaned and swaddled, the child still had the squashed appearance of the newborn, his features pinched and swollen in ways that made it impossible to tell one baby from the next, though all in attendance swore he was the most beautiful ever born.
