The doors to my quarters were a welcome sight. Finally, some privacy. If I was going to be in this much pain, the least I could ask for was a little space of my own.
But a knot of five servants descended upon us from the moment Thevan opened the door. Their expressions went from ready attentiveness to fear before I even had the chance to blink. They immediately surrounded us and yelled conflicting commands to each other, each one wringing their shaking fingers as they stared. Without thinking, I looked for Chaaya. She would know what to do?—how to calm these women and guide them with purpose. But she wasn’t here.
Tears rimmed my eyes, and Thevan’s eyes widened with alarm as he misread my grief.
“Close the door,” he said. “We need to get her to her bed. The master healer is on her way.”
That seemed to get their attention. The gossip that had followed us dulled, and I didn’t need to turn back to know that my chambers were finally my own, shut off from the rest of the fort. Two servants followed Thevan as he carried me to my bedchamber, but he stopped short of the threshold.
“Put me down,” I said.
He hesitated, curling his fingers around me, not wanting to let me go but also knowing he was not allowed to set foot inside.
“I’ll be fine,” I said, and I squeezed his shoulder.
He didn’t loosen his grip.
“This is for me to do.” I signaled to the two servants. “Just make sure Tara gets here quickly.”
Having a new purpose seemed to finally convince Thevan to lower me down, and the two servants came to my sides and took my hands. Nothing I could say would wipe the worry off my general’s face, but he had the good sense to stay silent and salute before hurriedly marching out of the room to find Tara.
The doors were closed behind him as I was led into my bedchamber. The vast room was not nearly as opulent as my room in Aru’s palace, but it felt more comfortable than any of the ornate Banghervari pillows ever could.
I moved toward my bed, longing to lie on something, anything, but one of the servants pulled my hand back.
“Forgive me, Rani,” she said. The woman was small, almost a whole head shorter than me, and her full, blushing cheeks betrayed her youth. “But you shouldn’t lie down. You should stay on your feet and rock if you need to. That’s what my amma always did.”
The door slammed open, and another woman hurried in holding a pouch. She held it against my back, and warmth filled me. It helped my muscles unwind?—not completely, but at least they weren’t clenched so tight anymore.
“What is that?” I asked.
“Uncooked rice that has been heated,” the woman replied softly. She shifted the pack to another part of my back, and I felt those muscles relax as well. “When my sister was giving birth, my amma used this.”
Soon all of them had a suggestion to help and a story to go with it. As I walked around the room, sometimes bending my knees and bouncing up and down, I realized they knew far more about my situation than I did. The Spirits had claimed my mother so long ago, and I hadn’t spoken to Tara yet because I’d thought I had more time.
But these women knew.
They had seen this before and knew they would see it again, and they were determined to see me through it. Gone were the frazzled, conflicting orders to each other. Calm reigned as they took shifts walking with me and applying the heat pack as I leaned on the sturdy arms of my jute sofa and chairs until Tara arrived.
She surveyed the room critically but gave an approving nod. “Keep a kettle on the fire. Two, if you can. And we’ll need clean cloth. As much as you can get.”
“The baby can’t be coming,” I said. “It’s too early.”
Tara rolled her eyes. “You don’t get to choose.”
Before I had a chance to craft what I was certain would be a stinging retort, my baby made the truth in Tara’s words abundantly clear: There was a popping feeling inside of me?—as if a bubble had burst?—and a gush of liquid poured down my leg.
“What is that?” I stared at the puddle that was still growing at my feet. “That can’t be normal.”
“It’s very normal.” Tara ignored it, and she kept her hand on my stomach as she listened to my heartbeat. “Now shush.”
Two women rushed to my side, each taking an elbow.
“Why are you?—” I understood before I could finish my question.
A pain unlike anything I had ever experienced tore through my back and forward to my stomach, and I would have collapsed had it not been for the two women beside me.
My bones wanted to split open as a fire seared through my marrow spaces, coursing its way through my body, and I fought the urge to fall to my knees. I screamed with all my soul.
