“You two seem pretty amused for the situation,” I said. “I don’t recall uttering a punchline.”
“You are the goddamn punchline, Asher.” Chris wiped his eyes. “You and Katie.”
“What do you mean?” Katie finally spoke.
“I’m not leaving Chris at the altar,” Michelle said. “And he’s well aware of me ‘hiring’ you to come here…”
“I’m still not seeing the joke,” I said. “And if you have to explain it, it was never funny.”
“We didn’t hire you to break us up,” Chris said.
“We hired you because you won’t admit you’re in love with her.”
“Come again?”
“She’s the only woman you’ve talked to us about for the past two years, and I’m tired of you coming up with all the ways you hate her when it’s obviously?—”
“Obviously—the exact opposite.” Michelle finished his sentence. Then she looked at Katie.
“Your staff says the same thing about you, Katie,” she said. “I tried to book a wedding with you two years ago, and they said you were in something called Asher-recovery mode. Thankfully, one of your interns was drunk and couldn’t stop talking, and I put two and two together.”
“So, this entire thing was a waste of my time?” I asked. “You two just wanted to play a ridiculous game of matchmaker?”
“Is this a fake wedding?” Katie crossed her arms. “I squeezed you into my schedule and bent over backwards for a ruse?”
“No, we’re definitely getting married,” Chris said. “That won’t change, but the day after we say ‘I do,’ I’ll never listen to you complain about Katie again.”
“Oh. Okay.” I rolled my eyes. “How will I ever continue living my life with that type of boundary in place?”
“I don’t talk to either of youthatoften,” Katie said. “And I definitely won’t after this… How exactly does your bullshit game affect me?”
“It would suck for your business to get a bad review from a Fortune 500 CEO, wouldn’t it?” Michelle narrowed her eyes. “Especially if we contacted every person in media we know…”
“You wouldn’t dare…”
“Oh, I would.” Her smile was long gone. “I’ve lost count of the times you’ve talked about Asher whenever I called you to catch up. Hell—it’s even more since we started planning this wedding, and that pink cork board in your office that you think is for your staff to count tasks?” She paused. “It’s a running tally for the number of times you bring him up every fucking week… They have to start over on Sundays because that’s how much you bring him up.”
“My personal life is none of your business during this process, Michelle… You’re the client. Not me.”
“What an odd way to say thank you.” Michelle fired back, and then she squeezed Chris’s arm.
“We’re not asking you two to declare dying love for each other,” he said. “We’re just asking you to stop playing games for the remaining days we’re here. Oh, and to stop dragging everyone else into your drama.”
“The final pre-ceremony brunch is tomorrow at noon,” Chris said, standing to his feet. “I suggest that you’re both there on time, and that you come up with a truce so you won’t make another scene.”
“You’re lucky we made everyone delete the footage…” Michelle said to Katie. Then she stood up and looked at me.
She parted her lips as if she wanted to say something else, but she shook her head and let Chris lead her away.
When they were out of sight, I sighed and turned to face Katie.
“How much did you pay them for this game?” I asked. “I know you’ve always been attracted to me and you’re obsessed with ridiculous romance plots, but this is a bit extreme. Even for a desperate romantic like you.”
“I wouldn’t pay anyone to ruin my life.” She hissed. “That’s your lane.” She looked like she was about to try another version of assault, so I grabbed her wrist.
She jerked against my grip.
I didn’t let go.
