“Brooks mentioned you were doing well in hockey and I’m in Sterling Ridge at the moment, so I?—”
“So, you what?” he snapped. “Decide to come see me like nothing has happened? Pretend like everything is ok?”
“No, I almost didn’t come because I knew I fucked up,” I said as we walked. “I expected nothing, I really just wanted to see you play and I was close, so I thought I would offer my support. You’re doing great here.”
Parker didn’t respond as we kept walking to, I don’t know where.
“I’m glad you kept up with hockey, you look amazing out there,” I said nervously. “Brooks said that next year?—”
“Why now, Nash?” he snapped.
“Because I missed you. Because I’m fucking tired of letting that man keep me away. I’m an idiot for not trying harder to keep up with you and Collin,” I said, running a hand over my face.
“You left us,” he sighed, stopping abruptly. “I haven’t seen you in five years. You didn’t bother to show up to my graduation.”
“They didn’t let me,” I said. “Brooks told me, but father told me if I showed up, he would pull my fund and cancel your party.”
Parker's nostrils flared. “You could have tried harder. You left me alone, left us alone.”
“Brooks—”
“Brooks!” Parker laughed. “Brooks only cares that we don’t mess shit up for him. He keeps us in line so that father makes his life easier, don’t think for a second that Brooks cares about any of us.”
I opened my mouth to defend Brooks, but what he said wasn’t too far-fetched, in a way he was right. Brooks made sure we did what dad told us to do.
“Look, our family dynamic sucks and I’m sorry I took the coward's way out,” I said, taking my hat off. “I saw a way to get out, and it was easy to blame dad for staying away, but I also thought it would be better if I wasn’t around. I’m the fuck up.”
Parker glared at me. “Better for you or me?”
“For you and Collin, what could you possibly?—”
“You’re such a fucking idiot. We looked up to you,” he snarled. “You were the one part of the day that didn’t feel scripted or forced. You were unapologetically you, with no fucks to give and I needed you. We needed you, but you left us.”
“I’m sorry,” I whispered, my throat tightening with emotion. “I fucked up. I didn’t realize…”
“I’m fucking sorry too, for thinking you would come back and be the big brother I needed,” he said, shaking his head a few times before walking away from me.
“I’m in Sterling Ridge, staying at the Aurora Ranch if you need me!” I yelled. I wondered if I would ever see him again, and what had happened to the jovial, carefree boy who used to ask me if he could sleep in my room because he liked to stay up late talking about the stars, sports and everything in between.
“Hey, Nash!” I looked over my shoulder to see Theo waving me over to the porch.
I sighed, wanting nothing more than to go to my cabin to drink and pass out for the second day in a row. Seeing Parker had sent me into a small spiral. I just needed a few days to get drunk and forget about my family’s troubles before I tried to talk to Iris again. I was mentally exhausted.
“Yeah,” I said, walking to him.
“Hey, can you do me a favor?” He led me into the house.
“Sure,” I said, even though I didn’t want to.
“Iris has the flu, can you drop off some supplies for me?”
I perked up at the mention of his sister. “Uh, yeah. Is she ok?”
“Yeah, I was supposed to take medicine and this soup to her, but Nova and Sol are sick. Colt isn’t back and Atlas is stuck at work,” he sighed. “I don’t feel comfortable leaving my girls.”
I smiled. Theo was really sweet, and I admired him.
“Yeah, of course, just give me an address and I can drop it off,” I said, grabbing the bags he handed to me.
