“Did you?” He raised an eyebrow.
Bennie sighed. “Just answer him.”
“Yes.”
“How often?”
“Twice? And I took like three drops on two other occasions, but I’m not sure that counts.”
Aries snorted. “No, youngling. That does not count as drinking blood. Hmm.” He let out a long, put-upon sigh as if my only having consumed my mate’s blood twice was somehow an inconvenience to him. “I wonder…”
Could he fucking get to the point already?
I let out an impatient snarl, and my fangs dropped in warning. It wasn’t like I could help it right now. Everything was setting me off. I needed to destroy something. Someone. The fucking fledglings. I’d show them what it meant to lay a finger on my mate.
“Okay, okay. Jeez, youngling, you should try yoga. Might do you some good to help you control yourself.”
Bennie groaned, stepping up next to me. “Aries. Now’s really not the time for teasing.”
I swallowed.
Bennie said that. Bennie. My jokester sire.
Dread filled me, momentarily robbing me of my senses.
“I said,” Aries reiterated, as if he were repeating himself. And truly, he might be. “That even though they haven’t formally consummated and thus secured the mate bond, there obviously is a bond in place.”
“What kind of bond?”
“The one that drew you to him in the first place. It’s a fragile, shaky thing, though. That’s why the pull gets stronger and stronger, as does the need to secure the bond. However, there are ways to… solidify the connection without actually creating the permanent mate bond. It’s reserved for times when the mate needs more time. Usually, that’s the case if one of the mates is human. Drinking one’s blood is one way. You’re consumingparts of your mate, and that brings you closer. You should’ve felt your connection getting stronger after drinking from him. It might have felt as though you were more relaxed.”
I swallowed.
Had I felt that?
I couldn’t say for sure.
I didn’t know.
Just like I didn’t know anything.
Not where Finn was. Not if he was okay. Hell, I couldn’t even say for sure that he was still alive.
He had to be, right? I’d feel it if he were dead, wouldn’t I?
Wouldn’t the bond or whatever be completely gone?
Not that I could feel a bond. Not like a rope. More like a… pressing feeling to search for my mate. To get close to him. Watch out for him. Make sure he’s okay.
Just like I’d been doing for three years.
And look where it had got me.
“I want you to focus on that bond.”
I closed my eyes, agony and despair filling the emptiness in my chest until they threatened to drown me completely.
I’d just said I didn’t really feel a bond.
