I gripped my phone hard enough to break it.
Colin: No. Not home.
I slammed my phone down on the cushion and scrubbed my hands over my face. I was ready to launch my phone into the pool when it buzzed again.
Colin: Why?
Me: I want to talk to you.
Colin: Okay. I’m not home.
Me: I KNOW THAT!
Colin: You don’t have to yell.
Me: I fucking hate you.
Colin: No ya don’t. Ya really don’t.
I got up and went directly to my wine refrigerator for a beer. Popping the cap off, I took a long pull, then set it down. It wasn’t what I wanted, so I poured the contents into the sink.
My phone vibrated again. I could see his name on the screen.
Colin: What do you want to talk about?
Me: I’ll wait until you get home.
Colin: Might be a long wait.
I frowned.
Me: Why? Where are you?
Colin: Stalker-ish much?
Me: Just answer the question.
Colin: Why? Because I’m busy.
Me: Why won’t you tell me where you are?
Colin: It’s a surprise.
Me: For who?
Colin: I believe that is for whom.
Me: You’re an English professor now?
Colin: No. I’m an Oxford grad.
Me: Oxford University?
Was he that fucking smart?
Colin: Fuck no. Oxford Day School in Sydney.
I burst out laughing. He was such an idiot. He had completely derailed me, but still avoided my question.