And then I was alone, left to wallow in my thoughts. Immediately, the frustration inside burst forth in the form of tears. Who did I have to talk to about this? Matt hated me, and my mother was just hoping that I’d wake up from the twisted fairy tale my life had become over the last few months. Alyssa wasn’t my friend anymore. Bailey was really only concerned with Tyler. Janel couldn’t stand Neil, and I couldn’t stand hearing her run him down. When I really got down to it, I was alone. I’d been dragged out into an ocean of troubles, and I was drowning there. I screamed for help, but no one could hear me.
Neil was the most important person in my life; my heart was bound to his. I knew that I was going to live through this upcoming misery along with him.
I didn’t even want to think about how much he was going to hurt.
His world would come crashing down on him all over again.
He’d find out he’d been living a lie his whole life, that the man who beat him was not his biological father.
That his mother knew it all along.
That his real father knew it.
That I knew it…
And he’d probably never smile at me again.
He’d never touch me again.
He wouldn’t let me sleep next to him anymore.
Or kiss his lips.
Or touch his body.
But I would do everything I could not to lose him.
I would keep fighting.
For him.
For us.
I curled up into an agonized ball on the armchair, trying to warm myself before the fireplace. The exhaustion of the day made my muscles ache even as the throbbing in my head slowly eased. I shut my eyes slowly, and then…
* * *
I had no idea how long I’d slept.
I wasn’t as cold as I had been, though, and a pleasant torpor made me moan sleepily as a hand gently stroked my hair. I cracked my eyes open to see a pair of golden ones staring at me. They were so luminous, I had to take a moment just to stare at them.
“I thought you might join me in the shower, instead you fell asleep. Can’t keep up, huh?” Neil’s deep voice sent shivers down my spine, and I shifted slightly, feeling the numbness in my bones from sitting too long in an awkward position.
“I’m sorry,” I mumbled, and he gave a slight frown of confusion.
“You can make it up to me tonight, Tinkerbell,” he whispered lewdly.
I sat up slightly to get a better look at him: He was crouched down next to me wearing just a pair of gray sweatpants, and he smelled strongly of bath gel. His chestnut hair was still wet, and one renegade lock of hair had fallen over his eyebrow. I avidly watched the appealing movements of his arms and chest as he lifted a hand to fix it. “Do you want to sleep out here or with me?” he asked, touching my cheek. What a stupid question.
With him. Always with him.
“With you,” I answered immediately. He smiled and held out his hands to help me up. I leaned against his body for support, sucking in a breath when I felt his bare chest pressed against my sweater. I wished that I was also naked and could soak in his warmth skin-to-skin. I looped my arms around his neck and planted a kiss on his jaw.
“How many times do I have to tell you—you are sickeningly sweet.” He wrinkled his nose, making an annoyed face, and I moved further down his throat.
“You seem to like my sweeter aspects,” I said in an arch murmur.
“No, I like it when you scream my name while I’m hitting it from the back,” he whispered wickedly. Then he slapped my ass, and I jerked forward.
