He shakes his head slowly. “I’ve decided today I’ll be going home for Christmas. I hadn’t planned on it, but I’d like to see my parents, and it’ll give me a chance to deal with some of the business issues in person.”
“Oh. That’s great.” My voice is so faint, it’s barely audible over the music. It’s not like I’d expected to spend Christmas with Spencer or anything, but I’d hoped to at least see him over the holidays, especially with Jordy leaving next week. I’d hoped I could convince him to attend the yearly dinner at Evie’s parents’ place or one of the smaller get-togethers us girls have each year. Now that Evie and Stella have boyfriends, it won’t be just the four of us anymore, so he would have been a welcome addition.
Spencer is watching me closely, as if trying to gauge my reaction. I force a smile. “I’m sure your parents will be glad to have you home.”
“Yes, I’m certain they will. Do you have plans for the holidays?”
“Yes and no. I managed to get some time off work. I booked it shortly after Jordy moved in with me, thinking we could spend her holiday break together. Now that she’ll be gone, I’m trying to decide whether to cancel the time off or have a break. The center is closed for several days over Christmas and New Year’s anyway.”
“You deserve a break. You work so hard.”
I want to ask whenhegets a break from allhishard work, but instead, I ask, “When are you leaving?”
“Likely Christmas Day or perhaps the day before if I can tie up loose ends here,” he says. “My parents said they’ll wait to have Christmas dinner until I arrive, whenever that is. And Hollie, I think you should know…” He scratches the back of his neck, his eyes darting briefly away from mine.
His words hang in the air, unspoken. Thoughts race through my mind, filling in the rest of his sentence.I think you should know…I don’t think we should continue seeing each other when I get back. My parents are setting me up with someone while I’m there. I’m reuniting with an old flame and we’re going to spend Christmas frolicking through London.
“London at Christmas,” I blurt. Looks like those sporadic Manhattans have taken effect and gone to my head. “What a dream. Well, for me, anyway. Maybe not for you since you’ve experienced it before. I follow a bunch of travel influencers online and the pictures from London the last few weeks have nearly made me swoon. All those lights, the Christmas markets, the skating at Somerset House. I’ve been living vicariously through their posts. I bet you’ve done all the amazing things there are to do in London at Christmastime.”
“I haven’t, actually. I’ve seen it in passing, of course, on my way to and from work and while getting around the city. My parents have never made a big fuss over the holidays, though, and I’ve never had anyone to do festive things with. It honestly never occurred to me to do them on my own.”
I nod, unsure of what more to say. The noise in the room suddenly escalates; a few more people have arrived since Spencer and I started talking, and there are more people on the dance floor. I should return to the party, considering I’m the guest of honor, but I can’t seem to pry myself away from Spencer.
“I should let you get back,” he says, following my gaze.
“In a minute.” I lead him further into the shadows. “You were about to say something else when I interrupted you with my London enthusiasm.”
His quick flash of a smile only lasts a second before it fades. “Right. I was going to say when I go to London, I’ll likely be gone for a few weeks.”
“A fewweeks,” I say breathlessly.
“Yes. My father is doing much better, but it’s been too long since I’ve spent any quality time with him. With either of my parents, really. And with the business arrangements that need to be sorted and Henry needing to be dealt with…well, it just seems to make sense.”
“Right.” All the delicious, greasy food I’ve eaten tonight turns to lead in my stomach. “Will you be staying with your parents?”
“No. I never got around to subletting my flat, so I’ll stay there. Family togetherness can be a wonderful thing, but it has its limits.”
I let out a weak laugh. A cheer goes up behind me, drawing my attention to the dance floor. A crowd has assembled, but I can’t see what’s happening. When I look back at Spencer, he’s watching me closely again. His gaze dips to my mouth; I can’t hear it, but I know he lets out a sigh by the way his shoulders rise and fall.
“Kiss me, Spencer.”
His eyes widen and his lips part slightly, glistening in the dim light.
“You wouldn’t deny the birthday girl this one request, would you?” Despite the sweetness in my voice, it’s a challenge and we both know it.
In a flash, he’s moved forward, erasing the space between us. He sweeps me into his arms and covers my mouth with his. It starts soft and slow like our previous kisses, but when I let out an involuntary moan, Spencer’s grip tightens and he kisses me harder. There’s a hint of desperation in it, a longing that resonates through me from head to toe.
Spencer releases me suddenly, leaving me feeling like all the air has been sucked from my lungs. He’s breathless too, causing a strange sort of satisfaction to zing through me. My legs wobble and he reaches out to steady me. His hands are clammy on my bare arms.
“Come to England with me for Christmas, Hollie.”
If Spencer’s kiss left me breathless, his words make my head spin. When the breath returns to my lungs, I sputter out a disbelieving laugh. He doesn’t laugh with me. “You’re not serious. I can’t go to England with you.”
I expect him to backtrack and say he was kidding or the words slipped out because he got caught up in the moment. Instead, he says, “Why not? You said yourself you already have the time off work. Jordy will be gone. Your friends will naturally make time for you because it’s obvious they adore you, but things will be different this year with Evie and Stella in relationships. You’ve always dreamed of visiting England, and you just admitted how you’ve longed to see London at Christmas. I’d have work and family obligations, but I could be your personal tour guide. We could experience all the wonders of a London Christmas together.”
I stare at him. I can feel my mouth hanging open, but I can’t seem to close it or make words come out. My mind conjures up all sorts of images of Spencer and me in London: admiring the lights, strolling through Christmas markets, visiting museums and historical sites, maybe even taking in a show or two. The visions morph into the two of us alone in his apartment, lit only by the glow of Christmas lights as we kiss, letting our hands explore, and…
That last image seems to be what finally snaps me from my stupor. “But we’re…we’re not even…”
