“Jason, please.”
Nervous, she glanced around, determined not to involve him in gossip. “I can’t call you that!”
“Just for tonight?” He took her hands and drew her to the shadowy end of the terrace away from the flaming torches. “Now. No one shall hear but us.”
“Jason,” she murmured, knowing he would kiss her and helpless to resist.
He gently smoothed a thumb along her bottom lip. “I like how intimate my name sounds on your lips,” he murmured. He lowered his head and covered her mouth with his. An explosion of desire inflamed her, her hands on his nape pulling him closer. Jason gasped and enfolded her snug in his arms. Breathing him in, she melted into him, and her fingers threaded through his silky hair. Held close against his hard chest she never wanted to leave his arms.
Finally, logic won out over the urgent demands of her body. She broke away and placed a hand on his waistcoat to put some space between them. She could feel his heart beating as fast as hers and grew afraid she would cry. “Please. I cannot…”
“Is it because you don’t want me?” he asked, his voice low and urgent. “Your kisses prove otherwise.”
“No! You must not think that. But I must explain…”
“Is it because of that rakehell, Lawley?”
Horrified, she stared at him. “You know?”
“Lizzie only just told me. She was there that night. I wish I could have dealt with him, sweetheart.”
Helen released a long sigh. “I feared you would want to. But I won’t allow you to involve yourself in this.”
“Is it the only reason you won’t marry me?”
She refused to answer, knowing he would discount her fears. She wanted desperately to throw caution to the winds. But she could not, would not, endanger him and tried to explain. “When I heard that shot in the library and feared it was you who had been hurt, it almost brought me to my knees. Even if you gave me your promise not to approach him, Lawley is the revengeful sort. He would challenge you. I don’t believe you would refuse that challenge. Now that his father has died and he’s inherited a baronetcy, I am certain he will return soon to claim it.”
She held a finger to his lips when he tried to interrupt her. “There’s something I’ve never told anyone, not even my mother. After that night when he…Lawley bailed me up in Bond Street when I was shopping with my maid, just before he left England. He furiously stood over me and would have struck me if the street hadn’t been so busy. He blamed me for his father disowning him and threatened to find me when he returned to England and.”—she swallowed the lump blocking her throat and dropped her head with the shame of it— “have me again.”
“The devil!” Jason growled. “I only wish I could call him out.” He cupped her chin, raising her eyes to his. “Darling, Helen. You have such little faith in me. I just delivered a pair of slippery customers to Bow Street tonight before they escaped justice. I am perfectly capable of dealing with someone like Lawley. But…”
“You cannot—.”
He shook his head when she would argue. “Listen, my love. Lawley will never return. I’ve made inquiries about him at Horse Guards. He’s dead.”
“Dead?” She clutched his arm when her knees threatened to give way. “When? How?”
“Quite recently. The news has only just reached London. Knifed in some Calais tavern. He was on his way home to England.”
Helen struggled to believe it. She knew the hateful man’s threat had been real and had expected him at every ball and soirée she’d attended since. Then all the humiliation and distress and fear would have returned with him. Now, he never would. She blinked back the rush of tears.
“Cry if you must, my love. You have been so brave.” Jason drew a cambric square from his pocket and gently dried the tears on her cheeks.
With a tremulous smile, she clutched his lapel and sniffed. Her body seemed to have lost its ability to remain upright without assistance. “You can’t know what hearing this means to me.”
“I can only guess at it, sweetheart.” He pocketed his handkerchief. “So, now if you can offer no further reason to refuse me?” He sank gracefully down on one knee. “Will you marry me, Helen?”
“Oh yes, yes.” She pulled at his hands. “Get up, please. Your clothes will be quite ruined.”
“My valet will forgive me when he hears the reason. Bit of a romantic is Hicks.”
When he rose, she studied his dear face. “Are you sure, Peyton?”
“Jason,” he amended. “I want you very much, Helen. But areyousure, sweetheart?”
With a nod, she looped her arms around his neck.
Jason wasted no time in kissing her.
