At this rate, April should never, ever have forehead shine again. Ever.
The production guy had been in earlier to get everything ready, but it was a simple setup for this one. They ensured the lighting was good. There were a couple of umbrella things and some stand lights, but other than that it looked like a normal Zoom call set up in her living room.
No following her through the supermarket.
No celebrities teaching her to cook without common allergens.
Just April sharing her knowledge of meditative living and how to incorporate it into parenting.
She could so totally do this. A quick glance in the camera and she was ready to go. Her laundry-less couch, tidied living space, and Jack-vase on display was the backdrop for the show.
Rachel’s phone buzzed. She glanced at the screen. “It’s Jack.”
April’s heart did a high-dive jump to her toenails.
“He wants to know why you’re not answering,” Rachel said.
April had left her phone upstairs, so she didn’t have to worry about Kent calling to cancel on the kids. In a rare show of fathering, he had asked if he could take them up to Estes Park for the weekend.
They used to do that as a family every autumn. Though she thought she’d be sad not to go along, really April found honest relief that she didn’t have to spend the time with Kent making awkward conversation about things that didn’t matter to her anymore. His new whatever-she-was could have him. Sure, April missed the promise of what they should’ve been. She did not miss who her ex had become.
Perhaps, though he’d turned out to be a crappy husband, maybe he could still be a good dad. She wouldn’t hold her breath, but she’d hold on to hope.
“Tell Jack I left my phone upstairs.” The excuse was valid, but it sounded weak even as she spoke.
Rachel relayed the message. Paused. “April’s doing great.”
She gave two thumbs up to April to illustrate her point.
“Uh-huh,” Rachel said. “Sure.” She frowned. “Yeah, I know. Okay.” She held the phone away from her mouth asking, “Do you need to talk to Jack?”
April did. She so very much did. Her mouth parched at the thought of what Jack was doing in that moment. Which suit he wore. Whether he missed her.
“I’m okay,” she said. Yes, the words sounded stilted even to her ears, but Rachel was intuitive enough to know that April struggled.
“She’s finishing her makeup,” Rachel said into the phone, ducking her head, listening to whatever her brother said. Finally, she added, “Of course. I’ll tell her.”
April’s hands prickled with a desire to reach for the phone. To tell Jack he should come back when he wanted. She didn’t do any of that before Rachel hung up.
“Tell me what?” April asked. This time, she actually was nervous about what Jack wanted to say.
Rachel squared her shoulders and tilted her head a little to the right. She had the same blue eyes as her brother. April should’ve noted that before, but she’d never really paid much attention to her friend’s eye color. Not until right this moment. “He said to tell you he believes in you.”
Oh. That was—
Was the air in the room thinner? It felt thinner.
“April.” Rachel stuck the phone in the back pocket of her jeans. “I know I told you that Jack was a bad bet, that he doesn’t stay. But you should know that the way Jack looked at you was special. I’ve never seen him like that before. I know you’re doing what you need to do to move on, and that’s what you want. But he’s actually a great guy, and I think…”
“What do you think?” The air was absolutely thinner.Sooomuch thinner. That’s why those words had a subtle squeaky edge to them.
“I think he really cares about you and your kids. More than as just a guy who came to fix things.” Rachel gnawed at the edge of her lips.
“There’s something else you want to say.” April could see it from a mile away.
Rachel went back to staring vacantly at her clipboard. But, since they’d already checked off all the boxes, there wasn’t anything more for her to do with it.
“It’s none of my business,” she said.
