Sam told himself that as he backed away, watching Ben look for his first hand holds. It was an easy climb for someone who knew what they were doing, someone who was used to this kind of thing, but Ben was…
Well, he objected to having to run unless he was being chased. Sometimes even when he was being chased.
They’d been chased by angry people enough times in their life that Sam knew Ben would much prefer to duck into an alleyway than try to escape someone on foot. He clearly kept himself fit, probably because he walked everywhere, but outdoor activities were about as far from his thing as it was possible to get.
“You’re doing great,” Sam called out as Ben got off the ground. It seemed like the kind of thing couples did, and they were supposed to be a couple.
Sam’s instincts told him to shout to Ben about how nice the view was—and it was, climbing was doing amazing things for the way Ben’s ass looked—but fear of Ben murdering him later kept him from doing it.
Instead, he just quietly filed that particular visual away in the back of his mind.
Other couples were shouting back and forth at each other, the people on the ground offering advice, the people climbing shouting back that they knew what they were doing. Cries ofwhy are you always like this?filled the air.
Sam could see why most of them were there.
Ben was doing surprisingly well for a first time, correcting mistakes just before he made them, not afraid to step back down a level to find a better hand hold. He’d rolled up his sleeves, and Sam found himself distracted by the obvious strength in his forearms.
It was hard to ignore the fact that if anything, Ben was more attractive now than he ever had been. Experience looked good on him.
Not that he was old. Neither of them were. But they were older than the last time they’d seen each other, and Ben had weathered a whole lot better than Sam had. His sharp angles had softened out.
“Nearly at the top,” Sam called out, intending to encourage but realizing a moment later that Ben probably didn’t want to think about how high off the ground he was. All the same, Ben didn’t pause. Instead, he sped up.
Sam couldn’t have been prouder of him. He knew Ben was doing this for what seemed like all the wrong reasons, but he was still doing it. That was awesome.
The sigh of relief when Ben put his hand on the top of the cliff was visible, his shoulders rising and falling even with his arms extended well over his head. On the ground, Sam sighed the same sigh.
Ben was fine. Now he just had to get back down.
“You’re not gonna fall,” Sam called up. Ben nodded in acknowledgement, and took a few moments to catch his breath.
The trip back down was a lot more awkward, Ben refusing to let the rope take his weight and instead insisting on climbing step-by-step. Sam could see why he didn’t want to do it, but it was the hardest possible way to get back to the ground.
To Sam’s horror, about halfway down, Ben’s foot slipped on one of the holds, leaving him dangling for a heart-wrenching moment. Sam held the rope tight, his pulse pounding in his ears as Ben scrambled to grab the wall again.
He was gripping it before Sam could even shout up at him, but it had been a terrifying handful of seconds.
Though Sam knew Ben was never in any real danger, and he couldn’t have done anything to prevent it, he would never have forgiven himself if Ben fell. He was supposed to be watching, and helping.
His heart rate didn’t start slowing until Ben was a foot off the ground, readying himself to jump down. Sam stood behind him, eager to see him on solid earth again as soon as possible.
Ben jumped down, immediately overbalanced, twirled around as his foot caught on a rock again, and crashed directly into Sam’s chest.
Shit.
Sam’s pulse pounded in his ears as he caught Ben, stumbling back a few steps at the sudden impact. He could feel Ben’s whole body heaving, shallow breaths leaving him on the verge of hyperventilating.
Of course. He’d just faced his biggest fear for a solid fifteen minutes, and then he’d fallen at the last second. Sam would have been panicking, too.
“You’re okay,” Sam said, not wanting to make too big a deal out of it. Ben would have been embarrassed by anything more than the quiet reminder, and he was probably already embarrassed enough.
Ben took a deeper, fuller breath and leaned back a little, but not so far that Sam felt the need to let go of him.
They were so close right now. Sam could feel Ben’s breath on his cheek. He could have turned his head, just a tiny bit, and their lips would have connected. He could smell the freshness of Ben’s aftershave, almost feel the stubble on his jawline.
Sam’s stomach swooped as he realized he could kiss Ben, right here, right now. It would barely take any effort, just a tilt of his head. Just a little burst of courage, just enough to put himself out there, press his lips into Ben’s, whisper that he loved him, that he’d always loved him, that he wanted him now and forever.
His heart rate sped up again, the thought making him blush. Every millisecond felt like an eternity, knowing that he’d only have to make the smallest of moves, knowing that if he was a braver man, he would have.
