Ben’s stomach turned at the thought.
Ballsy, or Eliot. How was he supposed to make a decision like that?
Ballsy was what he’d always wanted. A project to call his own. Serious, hard-hitting journalism being dropped in the lap of the masses where they couldn’t ignore it. The thing he wanted most in the world.
And then there was Eliot, who had his whole career ahead of him, who’d worked so hard and was the voice of the future. Not only that, but he was Ben’s friend. One of a very, very small number of those, and one who deserved his help.
It was an impossible choice to make, and Ben couldn’t see why he was being forced to make it. If this was Claire’s idea of a sick joke, he didn’t appreciate it.
An idea occurred to Ben just as he opened his mouth to argue. He would have gone down fighting, but maybe he didn’t have to.
It was a terrible idea. Everything about it was bad. But it was also the best chance he had to rescue both Ballsy and Eliot from the fate that was about to befall them if he was pulled off what he was working on and onto this.
Besides, it was right out of Eliot’s own playbook. That was a satisfying touch.
Was he really going to do this?
It seemed like the only option, but even as Ben opened his mouth to speak, his stomach went cold with dread.
“Neither,” Ben said. “Send me. My name still has weight.”
Panic rose in Ben’s throat. What the hell was he doing?
Claire raised an elegantly-plucked eyebrow. “I didn’t know you were married.”
Ben shifted his weight on the chair under him. “I’m not, but I know a guy.”
“A guy?” Claire asked, obviously surprised.
Ben’s heart thundered in his chest. He hadn’t realized he was about to say that, but now he had, and it was too late to take it back.
He’d never been out at work before. He was only out to a very small handful of people.
“Yes,” he said, straightening up. “Is that a problem?”
After a moment of silence, Claire shook her head. “No problem. We’d already committed to sending a gay couple, anyway. I just… didn’t realize.”
Ben cleared his throat. “I like to keep my personal life personal,” he said.
No one needed to know that he never said anything about his personal life because, for all intents and purposes, he didn’t really have one. His evenings were filled with single-malt scotch and second-hand books.
This was a bad idea. Now that the words had left his mouth, Ben was struck by how much worse it was than he’d originally thought.
“Which is obviously your right,” Claire said. As much as Ben liked her—and he did, when she wasn’t trying to ruin Eliot’s career—he also liked to see her off-balance.
He was slowly realizing that he’d made a terrible mistake, but he couldn’t back down now. “So you’ll give me the fluff piece and leave Eliot alone?”
Claire looked at him for several agonizing seconds, and then looked over at her computer screen. “Okay,” she said after a moment. “Eliot’s off the hook. But this better be the best, most earnest article of your career.”
“I wouldn’t dream of turning anything else in,” Ben lied.
This was the worst idea he’d ever had. He couldn’t afford to show fear, but now that he’d reached the point of no return, he could see all the possible pitfalls.
Faking a relationship had worked out just fine for Eliot, but that wasEliot. Ben was a different person, and this plan hinged on the cooperation of a man he hadn’t seen in ten years before yesterday.
Sam had to agree to this. Or if Sam didn’t, Ben had to find someone else who would.
He doubted Danny would be into trading Eliot in for him, even just for the weekend.
