“I will.”
We’re both quiet for a few long moments. I have a lot I want to say, but I want to say those things in person.
“Are you okay with dogs?” Shaw asks.
“Yeah, I kinda have to be. My sister and her husband have six.”
“That’s a lot of fucking dogs.”
“They live on a farm so it makes sense, but still. You have a dog?”
“Yeah. Adopted him about six months ago. His name is Roger.”
“That’s a cute name. I’d love to meet Roger.”
“Bring yourself and your swim trunks. We’ll take care of the rest.”
“Sounds like quite the weekend.”
“I promise no part of it will be the worst anything of your life.”
“What did you just say about putting bad shit out into the universe?” I laugh.
“Brook, bring those big titties up and let us make it worth your while.”
“Okay, okay.”
We say our goodbyes and later, Shaw texts me his address and gives me some pointers on the best routes to take. I promise to check in with him along the way. I go back to my room, change my sheets and crack a window as I put on the fan. Deek wears the same cologne he wore in high school and it’s all over my bed.
* * *
“Thank you for keeping me company,” I say as I pull up to Shaw’s driveway. It looks exactly the same as the Google Earth pictures I’d pulled up the day before.
“No problem. I’m almost done with my puzzle, so we did each other a favor,” Noa says through the speakers.
“Promise me you’ll go out with Rayna tonight,” I laugh.
“I will!” Noa’s been on a real puzzle kick lately. It’s the most wholesome hobby ever, but she’s gotten real competitive about it with some random dude she was playfully shit talking online. Now every Saturday, she won’t leave her apartment until she finishes a new massive puzzle. This week’s is Pugs In Space. She sent me a picture of the box before I got on the road.
I pull up the hedge-lined driveway, right to the massive colonial. It’s a gorgeous house from the outside. Two stories, with what looks like a one-story addition. The grey wood shingles are weathered in this perfect way and the white trim looks brand new. I see Vaughn’s SUV parked in the driveway and try not to laugh at the fact that we practically have the same car. I stop my Tahoe right beside his Escalade in front of the garage. Off to the right in the middle of the yard is a big red barn, half covered with ivy. I’m guessing that’s Shaw’s wood shop. Movement to my left catches my eye and I see Shaw step out of the side door. A sleek chocolate lab pokes his head out to see who’s arrived.
“I’m here,” I tell Noa.
“Okay cool. Have fun with your nerdy lawyer friends. I need nerdy lawyer friends with beach houses on the Cape.”
“Add it to your vision board, boo.”
“Not a bad idea. Okay, check in with me or the girls. We love you!”
“Love you, too.” I end the call and let out a deep breath. Okay, so I may have asked for honesty this weekend and then immediately lied to my sister and my friends. I told them where I’m going. I gave Noa and Liz’s Vaughn’s information and explained that we are meeting up at his boyfriend Shaw’s place, but I didn’t tell them all the dirty details. I didn’t tell them who they really are. Who they are in relation to Josh. Sixteen months. It’s taken sixteen months to get to this point where I don’t feel bad about wanting my own life anymore.
I cut off the engine and open the door. “Hey,” I say as I climb down from the high cab.
Shaw comes down the wide brick path leading up to the driveway. Roger follows at his side, wagging his tail. “How was the drive?” Shaw asks as he takes my weekend bag from my hand and kisses my cheek, all in one smooth motion.
“It was good. Your directions were perfect.”
“Good. This is Roger. Roger, sit.” The chocolate lab immediately drops his butt to the gravel and looks between the two of us, hoping he did good.
