“There is something I need to tell you. Yesterday before we left town... I broke up with Josh.”
“What?But you guys just got together.”
“I know.” And it had been so good. Maggie squeezed her eyes shut, trying to block out the memory of his infectious laughter, the twinkle in his eyes, that quirky twitch of his eyebrow.
“You seemed pretty great together—I mean, once I got used to the idea. He must be so upset. He’s over the moon for you, Maggie.”
Maggie gave a mirthless laugh. “Oh, you know Josh.”
Silence stretched out like a taut wire. “What do you mean by that exactly?” Erin’s voice was strained.
“Come on, Erin. You know I love Josh, but he isn’t exactly known for longevity when it comes to romantic entanglements.”
“That didn’t seem to bother you a week ago.”
Maggie winced. “Please don’t be angry with me. I just... I’m overwhelmed with—with school starting and my mom and a bunch of unresolved stuff with Ethan. I just can’t deal with a new relationship right now.”
“This is exactly what I was afraid of, Maggie. Now things are strained between you and Josh, and it affects the whole family.”
“It doesn’t have to.”
“You can’t be that naive. Any fool can see he’s in love with you.”
“I’ll always love Josh. Nothing will ever change that.” Her voice wobbled on the last words. She was afraid of exactly that. That she’dlive the rest of her life loving someone who was sure to abandon her when something better came along.
Just like Ethan.
Just like her dad.
“I know you must have your reasons. I don’t mean to be defensive of Josh. I’m just—”
“He’s your brother. You should be defensive of him.”
“But you’re my best friend and I want the best for both of you.”
“I appreciate that.” A beat of silence passed while Maggie paced the floor, wishing she could find something to say that would smooth things over.
“Can I put on my counselor’s hat for a second?”
Maggie gave a wan smile. Erin always prefaced her advice that way. “Of course.”
“I feel like there’s more going on here. After Ethan died we discussed your abandonment issues and how his dying triggered them. Is that what this is? Are you afraid Josh will leave you because of his dating history?”
Erin’s words slammed into her heart. Tremors quaked through her body. She pressed her fingers to her temples. Her friend knew how to cut right to the matter.
“It’s just you and me here,” Erin said. “This won’t go anywhere else.”
“I just can’t do it, Erin. I don’t have the emotional bandwidth to deal with a relationship right now.”
“I realize Josh must seem like a poor risk, but I do believe he’s capable of settling down. I wouldn’t have gotten on board with your relationship otherwise. You’ve had a lot of loss and I want the very best for you.”
“I know that.”
“Losing Ethan was bound to make you leery of falling in love again. But, honey, at some point you’ll have to take that risk if you want love in your life. If you want Zoey to have a father—and I know that’s a priority for you.”
Maggie couldn’t even think about all that right now. “You’re about to suggest I return to therapy.”
A pause played out over the distance. “It wouldn’t be the worst thing.”
