Chapter Five
Iwoke up with a start. Then I heard it again. Knocking— no, more like banging. I got up, trying not to trip over my shoes in the dark and went to the door, pulling on the handle.
“Greg, this is my room until I can get off this damned island. Go sleep on the beach.” But when I opened the door and let my eyes adjust to the light, I saw Harvey leaning against the doorframe. And he did not look good. His shirt was messed up and his hand had blood on it.
“Oh my god, did you hit him?”
“What do you care? Aren’t you done with him?” he asked, his words slurred. His breath smelled like a distillery.
“I don’t want either of you getting hurt, even if he deserves whatever he gets. Where is he?” I asked looking both ways down the hall.
“Hell if I know. I didn’t hit him. Some other guy,” he said as he stepped past me and into the room.
“What are you doing? Go to your own room,” I said following him inside. He threw himself on the sofa across from the bed and covered his face with the back of his arm.
“That bitch is there. Can’t stay with her.”
“Oh, Harvey, you can’t stay here. What are you gonna do? Sleep on the sofa?” He certainly wasn’t sleeping in my bed. When a few seconds went by and no answer, I repeated, “Harvey” several times. He had passed out. I shook my head and fell on the bed, trying to forget that there was a drunken man on my couch.
The next morning the light from the window woke me up. I’d forgotten to close the shades, and it was 7 am. Oh well, I’d gone to sleep very early, anyway. Harvey was still curled up on the sofa, and I decided to get up and get breakfast. There weren’t many people up so early on a Saturday morning, so I had almost the whole restaurant to myself. I ate whatever I wanted and then started looking up return flights on my phone, wondering what the fees were for changing my flight. When I looked out onto the ocean from the terrace view of the restaurant, I thought to myself what a shame it would be to miss out on this place.
I was going to come here anyway when I believed that the private investigator was going to tell me about the affair. Why didn’t the PI find something incriminating during their trip? From what I’d witnessed on the balcony, it sounded as if Greg had tried to put a stop to it before Chicago (too little, too late). Maybe they’d had an argument at that time or were just playing it cool around their colleagues. Who knows, and honestly who cares? The truth was out, and all I knew at that moment was that I would explore St. Thomas on my own. I put my phone away.Why should I leave and go back to a big worthless house full of lies?What would I do back home besides sulk? Here there were miles of adventures. The first one was getting Harvey out of my room.
I went to the room to change into beachwear, and this time the noise woke him. He grunted something about turning off the light and then fell asleep again. Or so I assumed. I went to the bathroom to change, and when I came out, he was sitting right side up.
“Hi,” he said.
“Well, good morning,” I said throwing my clothes on the bed. I was wearing my bathing suit and a cover-up. What I was missing was my hat, sunscreen, and sunglasses. I searched for those, feeling Harvey’s eyes on me the entire time.
“What?” I finally said, throwing my hands at my side.
“How did you find out?” he asked, his voice more rugged than usual from sleepiness and the hangover he was likely experiencing. I sat on the edge of the bed and sighed. The last thing I wanted to do was repeat what I’d heard, but I did it because it was the right thing to do.
“Shit,” he said, leaning forward.
“Yeah,” I agreed. “That’s why I’m going to go enjoy my vacation, because, you know, fuck it.” I grabbed my tote bag and threw a book in along with the sunscreen and walked towards the door. “See ya.”
It turned out it was still so early that I was the only one at the beach. The water was so calm and crystal clear it was like an optical illusion. I lay out my things on a complimentary beach chair and sat in the one next to it. The sun was not out in full force yet so I skipped the sunscreen for now, enjoying the peacefulness. It was such a contrast to the turmoil in my head. Hard as I tried, I could not turn off the noise in my brain. After a few minutes, I took out my book and tried to escape through someone else’s imaginary world. I had almost accomplished this when my stuff was pushed to the side, and Harvey plopped himself on the beach chair. He said nothing and closed his eyes.
“What are you doing?” I asked. Why didn’t he understand that I wanted to be alone?
“Why didn’t you tell me before you went ahead and caused a scene?” he blurted out.
I lowered my sunglasses to get a good look at him. He was in his swimming trunks, sprawled out onmyother chair, also wearing sunglasses. His arms were lifted up behind his head as if he was sitting there enjoying the tropical paradise instead of asking me something I knew he didn’t want to.
“I did not cause a scene. No one around was looking. I was notyellingaccusations and insults,” I defended myself.
“Right. You were just kissing other men that weren’t your husband.”
“You have a lot of nerve judging me. If you would’ve thought it bothered Natalie, you’d have done the same thing. You’re just upset that she wouldn’t have cared,” I said, feeling absolutely guilty for saying it right away. It was probably the truth, but I didn’t have to throw it in his face that way. Why was I getting so defensive with Harvey? We were both in the same predicament, and I should be sympathetic towards him.
“You’re right, she wouldn’t have cared, and that’s why this mess is much harder on you right now than on me. Deep down inside, I’ve known for months that our marriage is over. I guess I was hoping this affair was real so that it could finally seal the deal, and I could move on with my life,” he said.
“I would never have guessed you guys were in such a bad place,” I said.
“You didn’t know you were in such a bad place either,” he responded.
“How can I ever trust my own judgment again?” I asked, not really expecting an answer.
