Exhaling, I tell her what happened—but not all the details, just enough to put her mind at ease. When she talks about coming back, worried there’s something I’m not telling her, I reassure her, giving my word that if something urgent happens, I will be the first to let her know.
I want her to keep enjoying her time there. Every day when she calls, her smile looks brighter. Especially since she got to Italy.
Alicia told me about the day she ran into her and Alexander on the street after a dance class. When I asked if anything had been going on before her trip, she said there wasn’t. She also promised that if she ever started seeing someone, she wouldn’t hide it from me and Alicia.
I think about the guy from the Hamptons. He seemed okay. Respectful. And I trust Mom to know what’s best for her. But I’ll always keep an eye out. I just don’t want to see her hurt like that again.
We keep talking, and I ask about the places she visited yesterday. Before we hang up, I make her promise she won’t cut her trip short.
As the screen goes black, I drag my free hand down my face, a dull ache throbbing behind my eyes.
I’m never drinking again.Last night was the first, and the last, time.
I go upstairs and take a shower, trying to wash away the night before. My phone rings just as I’m finishing getting dressed. Dalila’s ringtone.
I grab it from the bed before the second ring. The moment I answer, her voice reaches me, fearful and small. “Ethan.”
“Yeah.”
“I thought you were never going to talk to me again.”
“You’re the one who broke up with me,” I say, my throat tight. “And you didn’t answer my calls last night.”
I hear her sniffle on the other end, and something in my chest twists. “I’m sorry,” she whispers. “I was so jealous and stupid. I regret everything I said. I don’t want to break up. I want us back. I swear I’ll never do that again. I’ll trust you. I know you’re not like him and—”
“Dalila, breathe. Just... take a breath for me.”
She starts to cry. I press the phone between my shoulder and ear as I slip on my shoes. “Are you at home?”
“Y-yes.”
“I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
“You will?” she whispers, stunned. “You’re going to catch a flight just for me?”
She probably never saw the texts I sent. The calls she didn’t answer. “I flew in yesterday to see you. You weren’t home. Britt and Mary didn’t know where you were.”
She completely breaks down over the phone, louder now. “Oh God, Ethan... I didn’t know. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. I don’t deserve you.”
I run a hand through my hair.
“When I get there, we’ll talk, okay? I won’t be long.”
“I love you, Ethan.”
I tilt my head back and stare at the ceiling, my chest tight with something that hurts and heals at the same time. “I love you too, Dalila.”
Dalila is asleep now, her head resting in my lap. She drifted off halfway through the first season of her favorite show.
When I got here earlier, her eyes were swollen and red, dark circles visible beneath them. She met me at the entrance of her building, wrapped herself around me, and cried, breaking down completely. After that, we walked to a park nearby. She didn’t want her roommates to hear us.
We spent a long time talking about where things went wrong and the things we’re both too afraid to lose. We also set rules and boundaries for what trust has to look like from now on. I’ve always heard long-distance is hard, but I want ours to survive.
I believe her when she says this won’t happen again. She even asked me to be her boyfriend, saying it was her turn to make the move. Saying yes was a no-brainer.
Later, I walked her to her place. Even with her roommates in the next room, we managed to have our moment; we just had to be careful not to make a sound. Once we had the apartment to ourselves, we ended up on the couch, ordering food and binging her favorite show.
Tomorrow, I’m picking Alicia up early for breakfast. She didn’t even complain about the time, just seemed happy to see me before I head back to Ithaca.
