“The age gap. The fact that you’re the first man I’ve let myself fall for since my husband. All of the drama with Nora. We were doomed from the start.”
Cal’s balance shifted to his heels as if preparing to take a step back. “Edie, that’s not what I wanted to talk to you about.”
“You didn’t come here to break things off with me for good?”
“No.” He shook his head once. “Why would you think that?”
“Because you’re acting so serious. Like you have something huge to tell me.”
“I do have something huge to tell you.”
“And it’s not that you don’t care about me anymore?”
“Edie, I cannot think of a scenario in this lifetime when I would ever stop caring about you.”
She could think of plenty. She hadn’t made things easy on Cal. Right now being the ultimate case in point. “You’re not ending things?”
“To be completely honest, I don’t even know where you and I stand right now. I know we’re not a couple, but the whole thing with Josh.” Cal’s fingers speared through his hair in an act of obvious frustration. “All I know is how I feel. And those feelings are big, Edie. They always have been when it comes to you.”
“My feelings for you are big, too, Cal. Confusing at times, but consuming.”
He just nodded like he completely understood this limbo of emotion they found themselves in. “For those reasons, it makes it really hard for me to tell you this.”
“Tell me what?”
His hands were in his hairline again, and she feared he was close to ripping those windswept strands out by the roots if he didn’t rein things in. “I’ve been given an opportunity that I would be a fool to pass up. The chance to travel to Florence for six months to study under the best painters out there. I’ll even get to do some teaching of my own. It’s a once in a lifetime trip, one I’d be crazy to pass up.”
“Oh, Cal. I know you’ve always dreamed of going back to Italy.”
“I have.” He reached forward and touched her hand. “But this time, I want you to come with me.”
The weight dropped out of her, her stomach going feather light. “Cal—”
“Please don’t give me an answer right now unless it’s a yes.”
She just looked at him and he knew.
“We don’t have to go as a couple,” he redacted. “Just two artists eager to learn under some of the world’s best teachers. I’ve already checked and there’s one spot left in the particular course I’m signed up for. I’d love for you to come and experience this with me, Edie. Whether we end up together romantically or not.”
“Cal.” Her chest ached. Eyes watered. Mouth went dry. She cleared her throat softly. “I can’t.”
“Please, just think about it. You don’t have to give me a definitive answer right now.”
“There’s nothing to think about. Hannah’s due in five months. I can’t be across the world when my first grandbaby is born.”
All hope snuffed out from his eyes. “Of course.” His eyelids snapped shut, jaw tensing. “Of course, I didn’t even think of that.”
“Please know that in any other scenario, I would love to, Cal. It’s just not something I can commit to right now.”
“I completely understand. I’m sorry for not thinking all of that through before I even mentioned it.”
And that right there was the entire issue; when it came down to it, Cal and Edie were and would always be in different places. In their lives. In their professions. In their futures.
“We should probably get back inside.” Cal’s open hand called for hers. She let him take it. “We’ve put so much into this gala that it would be a shame to miss the entire thing,” he chuckled under his breath.
Edie couldn’t help but feel the duplicity in those words, knowing she’d also given so much of her heart to Cal, andrealizing that she just might miss out on the best thing to happen to her in a long, long while.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
