Because while I stood there in a loved-up afterglow haze, brushing my teeth and grinning ear to ear at the bird’s nest that was my hair… a soft wave of heat had rolled over my skin. Gentle at first, then hotter, until it felt as if all the force of my heat had settled into my back, burning like a torch.
My first thought was,the heat’s not over. But then it passed, and… I looked.
I was so shocked. I was shocked to the core of my being, staring at those marks that had just shown up without warning.
It felt like a slow-motion train wreck after that. Like I was above myself, watching myself shatter from a distance. Was there a flicker of joy before the grief hit? Maybe, maybe there was. But then the rest crashed in so hard, I couldn’t stand up without the counter for support.
My whole life had changed in one instant. One moment of blissful happiness, and everything I knew, everything I was, had gone. I felt it like a missing limb.
And then Valens had come in, perfect as always. There for me. Comforting, and I felt so damn guilty. Because how could I ever tell him why I was crying? How could I explain it to him in a way that wouldn’t make him feel like utter shit?
I didn’t regret a moment of the time we’d spent together, but my weeks of denial had come calling, and they’d knocked me flat on my ass.
But still, I let him hold me until my tears had run dry and my emotions had stabilized. Somehow, in his arms, I always found my center.
Because he was mine. For the rest of our lives, he was mine.
Now that some of the pain had passed, I found that comforting.
“I’m so sorry,” I murmured against the sticky skin of his shoulder, pulling back so I could scrub at my face. “I didn’t mean to cry like that. I just?—”
“It’s fine. Honestly. I told you before, you’re entitled to your feelings, and I won’t judge you for them.”
He was saying all the right things, but his voice was all wrong.
“Valens, what?—”
“I’ll clear out. Let you… clean up. Take your time.” He turned and walked out of the small bathroom that had felt so perfectly cozy before. Now, it felt suffocating.
“What? The heat ends, I get fucking mate marks, and you’re just going to walk out the door? Do you even have your marks?” I was hot on his heels, fury welling up to quickly replace my earlier grief.
He stopped, his head bowed, his back still to me. The back that bore twin marks to mine. Big and bold and beautiful. All wrong, though, with his tone. “What do you want from me, Elodie? Right now, what more do you want? Because I’ve given you everything I have to give. I’m not sure there’s anything left. Not right now.”
If he’d turned around and slapped me across the face, I couldn’t have been more shocked.
I watched in silence as he gathered long-discarded clothes and walked out the door.
He didn’t look back.
I slid down to the floor, buried my face in my hands, and sobbed all over again.
I wasn’t alone long before a knock came at the front door. I didn’t care, I didn’t move, I didn’t even respond. The knocking came again, more urgently, and then I heard the knob jiggle as someone let themselves in.
I should have gotten up, should at least have tried to find a bathrobe, but I didn’t. I just sat there, head back against the doorframe and tears my only companions.
Until Olivia and Fiona burst through the door.
“Goddess help us, Elodie!” Olivia flew to my side with supernatural speed, pulling me against her and rocking me as she whispered soothing nonsense.
Fiona disappeared temporarily behind Olivia’s cloud of red waves, but I heard her go into the bathroom, turn on the shower, rattle around in the cupboards.
A few minutes later, she squatted in front of me, her eyes shifted to amber and tight with anger at the corners like I’d never seen before. At least, not toward me.
“Let’s get you up. We’re going to shower, get dressed, and get some food in you, and then you’re going to tell me why I shouldn’t drop a fucking tornado on the man who left you like this.”
“Not helping, Fi,” Olivia snapped, helping me up.
“I didn’t say I was trying to help, did I?” Fiona answered, but there was no heat directed toward Oli.
