His free hand runs down the small of my back onto my ass, and I shiver. The weight of it feels so good right there.
"Jasper!" I shout, bucking against him when he moves all at once, annihilating me with one hard smack to my cheek and his hand pressing between my legs at the same time.
The pleasure is intense and immediate, like my body doesn't know which sensation to focus on. They bleed together, creating a harmony that only grows when he smacks me again, two fingers thrusting inside me.
"Good girl. Let me hear you, baby," he grits out. "Give me that sweet voice."
I sob his name—both of them—trying like hell to stay still. It's impossible, though. There's no stopping the way I rock back against him, eager for the pleasure ripping through me every time his big hand lands against my ass or his fingers curl inside me. There's no stopping the way I cry out for him, either, begging for more.
My knees shake, my body falling forward until my face is pressed to the cushions. I'm helpless then, unable to push against him. All I can do is take it—every hard smack, every wicked press of his fingers, every gritty word of praise he breathes for me.
"Daddy!" I wail, shattering so completely, the whole world goes black for a moment. There's nothing left but euphoria, coursing through my veins in place of blood.
When I come back to myself, I'm on his lap with his arms around me. His hands drift across my ass, rubbing away the way they sting.
"There you are," he breathes, his lips at my temple. "You look beautiful when you're crying for your daddy, baby girl."
I choke on his name, burying my face in his throat. It's only then that I realize what he means. My face is wet with tears. Not the sad kind or the ugly kind, but a kind that feels brand new and life-sustaining.
"You did so good for me." He tips my head back, kissing all over my face. "I'm so proud of you."
I just whimper and cling to him, letting him wreck me this way, too. It feels even more perfect than any other way he's wrecked me, like he's stealing entire tracts of my soul with every word he says and every soft touch.
I don't think he knows that they've been his all along. I don't even know how to tell him that.
Eventually, he pulls back, searching my face. "Are you okay?"
"Yes."
He cups my cheek, smiling at me. "Did you like it?"
I nod, blushing.
"Use your words, baby girl," he murmurs, brushing my bottom lip with his thumb. "You know how much I love hearing your secrets."
"Why?" I blurt and then cringe. "I mean…why do you like to hear them?"
"Because I see them in your eyes, baby girl. I know how much you're carrying, and I want to help you do it," he says. "And, selfishly, because I spent a long time thinking you were afraid to speak to me. I thought you were afraid of me. I fucking hated it. But it was never that, was it?"
"No," I whisper, feeling like I might shake apart. "I n-never hated you. I just…" I bite my lip, peeking up at him. "I was scared to let you see."
"See what?"
How much I've always loved you.
"Me," I say instead.
"I've always seen you, Sarah. It just took me a while to realize that I wasn't seeing you through my own dreams but through yours." His lips brush my forehead again. "It was right there in front of me the whole time, but when you're afraid to hope, sometimes, it makes you blind."
"I think I know how that feels."
His lips curve into a smile, and I know I'm not going to survive him. There's not a chance that's going to happen. He's going to own every single piece of my soul.
Chapter Nine
Jasper
"Why did you join the Navy?" Sarah asks, peeking up at me as we walk hand-in-hand toward the entrance to the Monarch Butterfly Grove at Pismo Beach. It's late in the season, and the population has been down for the last few years, but she loves coming here.
