My heart beats quicker and harder against my rib cage. “What if we went out for dinner?” I finally say.
Her eyebrows lift. “Like…outout?”
“Yeah, just two hours, me and you. Leave Emma with my mom.”
She hesitates. “I don’t know—”
“She’d love to. Or Addison would fight her to babysit too, I’m sure.”
Karissa chews the inside of her cheek, looking to the swing.
I shove my hands in my pockets. “It’s not a date. Just food. I’m not tryin’ to make it weird.”
Her gaze snaps to mine.
“I think you need a break is all,” I add.
“Okay, yeah. Sure.”
“Good. I’ll talk to my mom and I’ll text you.”
“Okay.” A soft smile surfaces from the corners of her lips, making something twist in my chest.
I head for the door, turning away before she can see how much that little smile of hers just wrecked me, then step out into the heat.
* * *
I’m freshly showered by five, the ends of my hair still damp under my hat. Jeans, boots, black Grunt Style T-shirt, which is tighter across my arms and chest than I remember. Deodorant, cologne…even trimmed the beard.
When I get to the lodge, I push the door open slowly before stepping in. I don’t knock because Mom’s already here.
She’s holding Emma in the kitchen, talking to Karissa, who has a paper in hand and seems passionate about whatever is on it. Couldn’t tell you what, I’m too distracted. Her hair is curled, her makeup light, but it’s enough to make her glow. She’s wearing jeans. I haven’t seen her in jeans. She looks…good.Realgood.
Karissa finally looks to me, giving me a quick “hey” and a smile before looking back at my mom. “Anyway, so I fed her at four. She’ll probably want a bottle around six. It’s in the fridge. Itaped instructions to it, and there are more bottles in there if she needs more, but she should be fine until we get back I’d think.”
Mom nods with a smile; it’s clear she’s not worried about the evening. I’m certainly not.
Emma shifts in Mom’s arms, grunting a little before starting to fuss. Karissa jumps in with more information. “She’s been fussy the past two evenings, so if she cries, just try bouncing her first. If that doesn’t work, the pacifiers are on the coffee table in the white bowl. She likes the green ones best.”
“Got it,” Mom says patiently. “She’ll be great.”
“She hates diaper changes,” Karissa adds. “So I lay a blanket across her belly so she isn’t too cold.”
Mom continues to bounce Emma gently in her arms and smiles. “Okay.”
I watch Karissa’s eyes bounce from Emma to the rest of the house like she’s trying to remember every possible detail that could be helpful.
“And—”
“Karissa…” I interrupt, as nicely as I can.
She looks at me. I shove my hands into my pockets and jerk my chin toward Mom. “She’s got four kids. She’ll be fine.”
Mom smirks softly.
“I know,” Karissa whispers. “I just…I haven’t left her yet.”
“You left her with me,” I remind her, thinking back to just last week when she had her postpartum appointment. “If you did that, you really have nothing to worry about.” I laugh and so does Mom.
